We can’t… we… just… we need to sit down for a moment. Just when we thought the Kelly Brook and David McIntosh saga might actually finally be over… it turns out it’s not.
Because he reckons they’re back together. Again.
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We’re too exhausted to even pass comment at this stage, so here’s what David had to tell The Sun about his relationship with Kelly.
*deep breath*
Kelly Brook and David McIntosh
To put this in perspective, here’s what David had to say about his relationship with Kelly literally TWO WEEKS AGO: “It sounds soft but it was like being bullied. She would say childish stuff to try and hurt me all the time.
“She would tell me that I was useless, I was no good or that I wasn't nice, even though I did everything for her, from making her breakfast every day to buying her little presents all the time.”
So… from bullying accusations to true love in the space of two weeks. How does David explain that?
Well, according to The Sun, he was acting out, following the revelation by a showbiz journalist that Kelly had publicly dumped him.
He added: "I was hurting, man. I didn’t even know. I said a lot of things that I didn’t actually mean.
“I had to keep going with the interviews because I was promoting my [nutrition products].”
And there you have it, folks. Back on. For now…