When you look at the towering platform shoes you think "broken ankle".
Your friends have taken to calling it CropShop...
And you're the only person in the store not wearing a crop top.
Because you've grown out of showing your midriff at every opportunity....
When you find yourself silently weeping in the maternity section because it's the only part that doesn't sell crop tops.
You don't fancy dressing in the same clothes as your fifteen-year-old niece/cousin.
When you wear the towering platform shoes and actually break your ankle...
When you and a 12-year-old reach for the same dress.
When you decide it's time to say no to neon.
You don't even go in because there's a DJ playing in the doorway AND THIS IS A GODDAM SHOP NOT A NIGHTCLUB!
And If you do, you find yourself muttering the words "ear plugs" because the music is way too loud.
When you don't get your 10% student discount anymore. *sobs*
Then get rumbled for trying to flash your five-year out-of-date NUS card at the sales assistant.
You become increasingly aware of the fact that the clothes are more likely to fit your cat than you.
When you feel scornful that a see-through rain mac is "fashion"... what the kids are wearing these days eh?
You never, ever set foot in the Oxford street any more because there's just TOO many people. The clothes aren't worth that.