Kanye takes a bow during his Paris Fashion Week show. Photo: PA
Kanye West is becoming something of a fashion curio. He launched his first collection to what we shall politely call 'mixed reviews', announced over Christmas that he intended to move to London to pursue his designer dream, and is now on some kind of Twitter binge/stream of consciousness.
You can read the whole thing if you scroll down but here are our highlights:
1. Kanye sneaked into the Giuseppe Zanotti factory and learned to design women's shoes for two years. In our heads Kanye is like the mice in the Tailor of Gloucester. Except he's a cobbler.
2. Kanye had the chance to intern at Fendi and work at Versace but his Louis Vuitton contract proved rather an obstacle.
3. Kanye does not have a French VAT number. Apparently this meant his Parisian design studio was sans fabrics. We feel this to be quite the barrier for a fashion designer and surely something one would investigate tout de suite?
4. Azzedine Alaia was not put off by the VAT business and visited the studio one day. This was a source of great joy for Kanye as evidenced by the :))) smiley.
5. As a five-year-old Kanye had a penchant for expensive furs.
6. Kanye's mother had an embellished Cosby Show sweater which we are now fighting the urge to scour the web for. Seriously. We need that sweater in our lives.
7. In fourth grade (which is about Year 5 in British school measurements) Kanye brought dirty magazines to school.
8. He has started a design company called DONDA which appears to be an incredibly ambitious endeavour involving experts in every field from architects to nutritionists.
9. Kanye and his team are working on a seven-screen semi-sci-fi tech experience called 2016 Olympics.
10. He would also like to 'design' the MTV Awards. We assume his design will involve letting all the artists finish their speeches. Except possibly Taylor Swift.
11. He (possibly in collaboration with all of us) would like to "pick up where Steve Jobs left off." The tweet binge then finishes with a George Bernard Shaw quote involving apples. The two things may or may not be related.
Just hit play on the slideshow below and take a trip through Kanye's consciousness...