Ariana Grande has now unveiled the full tracklisting for her upcoming fifth album ‘Thank U, Next’, and one song in particular has raised eyebrows among her fans.
Sitting alongside singles ‘Imagine’ and ‘7 Rings’, and already-confirmed tracks like ‘NASA’ and ‘Needy’, is the album’s closing number, which she’s revealed is titled ‘Break Up With Your Girlfriend, I’m Bored’.
Good grief.
Obviously, the song has already sparked much speculation about who it might be about (and more to the point, who is she hoping to catch the attention of, if anyone?), but it also led us to contemplate songs from the pop vault with lengthy, intriguing and downright ridiculous titles.
Here are a few of our faves...
‘Oops!... I Did It Again’ - Britney Spears
The thing is, ‘Oops!... I Did It Again’ has become so engrained in pop culture since it’s release in 2000 that we almost take for granted that its title is so ridiculous.
But seriously, can you believe that not only did Britney Spears release a song called ‘Oops!... I Did It Again’ as the lead song from her much-awaited second album, she also named the whole thing after it?!
Still, unusual title aside, the song proved to be a massive tune for Britney, topping the charts all over the world, including here in the UK.
‘The World’s First Ever Monster Truck Front Flip’ - Arctic Monkeys
Arctic Monkeys’ 2018 album ‘Tranquility Base Hotel & Casino’ proved to be their most divisive release to date, not least because so many of the tracks had baffling titles.
‘The Ultracheese’ and ‘Batphone’ would both have been worthy entries to our list, were they not overshadowed by ‘The World’s First Ever Monster Truck Front Flip’, title for which doesn’t make any more sense after actually listening to the song.
‘Jacky’s Only Happy When She’s Up On The Stage’ - Morrissey
A fair few of Morrissey’s song titles are guilty of going a bit OTT with song names, with his last album alone boasting titles like ‘When You Open Your Legs’, ‘The Girl From Tel-Aviv Who Wouldn’t Kneel’ and ‘In Your Lap’.
We went with ‘Jacky’s Only Happy When She’s Up On The Stage’ as the most ridiculous, though, for the simple reason there’s apparently an allegory for Brexit buried in their somewhere.
‘I Thought About Killing You’ - Kanye West
Not so much “ridiculous” as “largely unsettling”, the opening track from Kanye’s 2018 album ‘Ye’ sees him confessing to a mystery companion that he’d fantasised about “killing them”, before declaring: “I love myself way more than I love you, and I think about killing myself, so, best believe, I thought about killing you today.”
So yeah, a fitting title, if not a rather uncomfortable one.
‘We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together’ - Taylor Swift
There’s “literal”, and then there’s this break-up tune from Taylor Swift. We’re just happy she stopped at one “ever”, to be honest.
‘There’s A Guy Works Down The Chip Shop Swears He’s Elvis’ - Kirsty MacColl
The late Kirsty MacColl sent up the country music trend of giving tracks elaborate and lengthy song titles with one of her most famous songs (or, at least, most famous songs that doesn’t just roll around in December).
And fair play to her, the song does indeed describe a a man who works down the chip shop, who swears he’s Elvis, noting: “He’s a liar, and I’m not sure about you.”
‘There’s a Good Reason These Tables Are Numbered Honey, You Just Haven’t Thought of It Yet’ - Panic! At The Disco
Panic! At The Disco’s debut album was positively jam-packed with songs whose titles had absolutely nothing to do with their lyrics, including ‘London Beckoned Songs About Money Written By Machines’, ‘Lying Is The Most Fun A Girl Can Have Without Taking Her Clothes Off’ and the still-fantastic ‘I Write Sins Not Tragedies’.
Sidenote: What an album, right?
‘Our Lawyer Made Us Change The Name Of This Song So We Wouldn’t Get Sued’ - Fall Out Boy
And we could hardly mention Panic! At The Disco without including a Fall Out Boy song, too, and this one leaves us with so many questions.
What was the original title? Why did they have to change it? Why didn’t they just name it after something from the song’s lyrics? Is this whole thing a cheap ploy to drum up interest in a song that people might not have even blinked at otherwise?
And speaking of...
‘The Black Hawk War, Or, How To Demolish An Entire Civilization And Still Feel Good About Yourself In The Morning, Or, We Apologize For The Inconvenience But You’re Going To Have To Leave Now, Or, I Have Fought The Big Knives And Will Continue To Fight Them Until They Are Off Our Lands!’ - Sufjan Stevens
No but seriously this is just ridiculous.
‘It’s Christmas (And I Hate You)’ - Josh Weller & Paloma Faith
A cheerful and touching little festive offering from Paloma Faith in the early days of her career, which sees her crooning her way through the end of a relationship around the Christmas period.
‘It’s Heaven And Hell (To Be Geri Halliwell)’ - Geri Halliwell
The most Geri Halliwell thing to ever exist is this oft-forgotten cut from her second solo album, ‘It’s Heaven And Hell (To Be Geri Halliwell)’.
And if you think the title is “a bit much”, wait till you hit play on the song itself, which offers a brief glimpse at Geri’s mindset around the time of its release in 2001. Opening with a brief Waltz intro, we’re swiftly taken through an electric guitar-heavy main section, culminating in Geri literally yelling into the microphone about PMS, and whether her bum looks fat.
A very unique song by a very unique lady.