Don’t you just hate when people think it’s completely okay to share unsolicited comments on other people’s bodies?
Whether it is about weight, height, features. Who asked you for your opinions? Why do you care?
Unfortunately, body shaming is everywhere, even on dating apps. Because according to a nationwide survey commissioned by OriGym, one in three women have been fat shamed and been on the receiving end of unsolicited comments about their bodies on dating apps.
There are countless stories on TikTok of plus sized women facing extreme hostility and unsolicited comments about losing weight and going to the gym on dating apps. The hashtag ‘fatshaming’ currently has almost 400 million views on the app.
Kerry McAvoy took to the social media platform to express her frustration, saying: “I’ve seen the same extreme hostility expressed on dating apps and social media of those who are looking for someone ‘fit’ towards those that they view as unfit.”
“It’s as if everyone is viewed as a consumable and you are evaluated based upon your level of sexiness and hotness. People are not consumable. Your perception of beauty is your own and it differs from person to person,” she added.
She then goes on to say that if these ‘unfit’ people do not fit this certain standard of beauty, then they are made to believe that they don’t deserve to take up any space.
According to the Weight Stigma Study, over 1 in 6 plus-size users were on the receiving end of weight discrimination. Whereas only 4% of ‘underweight’ and 3% of ‘slim’ people underwent the same treatment.
This is even worse among plus-size women, as 1 in 3 women with a dress size of 16 or over said they had experienced weight shaming on a dating app. The statistic also revealed that women are more likely to get body shamed than men by their family members.
Due to the rise of swipe-based dating apps, daters are now prioritising looks when choosing a potential partner. Seeing a never-ending stream of faces and bodies has seemingly had a negative effect and emboldened users to become more critical.
According to some statistics released by the dating app Bumble, almost 9 in 10 people feel that dating is a space where they feel more physically judged than other areas of life, with 1 in 4 saying that they have been body shamed online on a dating app or social media.
Over half (58%) of people under 34 have admitted to even cancelling a date due to body insecurities.
Naomi Walkland, Bumble’s Head of UK and Ireland has said that their body shaming policy has been put into place for this exact reason.
“Body anxiety can have a huge impact on how people date, which is why our body shaming policy is so important. We hope that our zero-tolerance policy for racist, hate-driven speech, abusive behaviour and harassment, does its part to make people on Bumble feel empowered to be their authentic selves comfortably and confidently,” says Walkland.
Weight shaming someone can have a lasting effect on someone’s mental and physical wellbeing. And you are doing them no favours by making comments on how they look or appear.
No one appreciates unsolicited comments — whether it be about their work, life, or any day to day tasks. No one likes being told what to do or how to do it. So why make comments about someone’s body?
“I think this reflects something very broken in our society,” says McAvoy, “It’s not the issue of people’s weight or fitness, it’s really an issue of the mentality we have of a human’s value.”
Bottom line, keep your unsolicited comments about someone’s body to yourself.