This week is National Deaf Awareness Week in the UK, where there are currently around 12 million adults with hearing loss greater than 25 dBHL (degree of hearing loss): the equivalent of one in five adults.
And despite 151,000 people knowing British Sign Language (BSL), 87,000 of those are deaf people, showing that for those who can hear well, we’re not doing enough to try to communicate better with those who are hard of hearing and deaf.
Here, deaf and hard of hearing people share the things they wished others knew about their experiences and share advice on how others can be more deaf-aware.
“It can feel quite lonely”
“It’s taken me so long to accept that I’m hard of hearing,” says Ella Major, 25, from south London. “I think people like Tasha from Love Island sharing and embracing her deafness and seeing it openly on our screens is huge for those who don’t feel represented.
“It can feel quite lonely especially for me as I’m not exclusively in the deaf community (mild to moderate hearing loss) but not exclusively hearing. Being able to lip read has been CRUCIAL.
“I can never hear my boyfriend when he tries to strike up a conversation in the dark at bedtime so always be facing the person and make sure your mouth is clearly on show.
“Group settings are also a struggle for me as it can be very hard to listen and digest what multiple people are saying. With those it can be tricky but just don’t get too frustrated if you can’t get involved and if you’re close with those people they will be accommodating in the group situation.”
Not all deaf and hard of hearing people are the same
“Not all deaf or hard of hearing people are the same!”, says fashion business owner Nina Butler. “I don’t sound deaf when I speak, so that seems to make it harder for people to sensibly respond to me.”
“I miss a lot of banter and jokes”
Not catching the natural camaraderie of conversation is something Gillian Dye, Edinburgh, really misses: “The things I find hardest – and miss most – is hearing what people are saying in cars (from the back seat) and being in a group around a table, as I cannot catch all the jokes and conversation if several are speaking at once.
“Parties are tricky. It’s annoying having to ask people to repeat things. I miss a lot of banter and jokes.”
People will assume you’re intentionally ignoring them
“In shops, security people can sometimes be horrible. I hadn’t had a tag removed properly at the checkout and I must have set an alarm off. I was casually walking across the car park and was aggressively stopped.
“I clearly wasn’t running away and, of course, in that scenario, I’m stressed out and embarrassed, so it makes concentrating on lip reading and my tinnitus 1000 times worse,” says Nina.
We don’t try hard enough to be understood by deaf and hard of hearing people
“I need to see someone’s mouth when they’re speaking, as I part lip read, like many deaf people do,” explains Dye.
“It’s important for people to speak clearly, facing you. I sometimes have to ask people who mumble to speak up, and lots of people speak while leaning on their hand.
“When I’m on a video call, people will often lean on their elbows with their hand over their mouth. Anything that obscures your mouth is tricky for deaf people.”
“Don’t treat me like I’m stupid”
“You only need to raise your voice if you’re asked to speak up,” says Arrowsmith. “No-one has lost their IQ in being deaf, so there’s no need to talk down to me.”
Some key takeaways for being more deaf-aware:
- Face the person while you’re speaking, don’t turn away
- Repeat yourself if necessary
- Keep your mouth visible
- Don’t speak too quickly or too slowly
- Speak one at a time - don’t talk over each other
- Write it down or draw a picture
- Reduce background noise or find a quiet environment
- Use simple gestures to communicate; point or even demonstrate
- Learn some basic BSL
- Be patient - if the person doesn’t understand you, don’t give up!
For more information and advice, visit the British Deaf Association’s website.