Donald Trump's Rambling 90 Second Speech Stuns English-Speaking World

'Can we have Sarah Palin back, please?'

A rambling, disjointed speech from Donald Trump has been dug up by social media users stunned at the US presidential-hopeful’s woeful grasp of the English language.

The address, given in July to 500 people in Sun City’s Magnolia Hall, South Carolina, was unearthed by those who wrote down Trump’s comments word-for-word and were stunned with the result. 

It shows a rambling stream of consciousness that spans the Republican nominee’s genealogy, his education, position on nuclear weapons, and the power of Persian negotiators. 

Decipher it if you can (transcription at the bottom):

The text left thousands dumbfounded, with others marvelling someone was able to punctuate the whole thing.

SNP MP John Nicolson branded it “truly terrifying”, while others even used it as a basis to implore Sarah Palin to return to frontline US politics.

Actor Toby Regbo managed to turn Trump’s own quotes back on him, referencing a quote he gave in October that said: “I know words, I have the best words.”

Well Donald, at least you’ve proved your critics wrong.

Transcription:

“Look, having nuclear—my uncle was a great professor and scientist and engineer, Dr. John Trump at MIT; good genes, very good genes, OK, very smart, the Wharton School of Finance, very good, very smart —you know, if you’re a conservative Republican, if I were a liberal, if, like, OK, if I ran as a liberal Democrat, they would say I’m one of the smartest people anywhere in the world—it’s true!—but when you’re a conservative Republican they try—oh, do they do a number—that’s why I always start off: Went to Wharton, was a good student, went there, went there, did this, built a fortune—you know I have to give my like credentials all the time, because we’re a little disadvantaged—but you look at the nuclear deal, the thing that really bothers me—it would have been so easy, and it’s not as important as these lives are (nuclear is powerful; my uncle explained that to me many, many years ago, the power and that was 35 years ago; he would explain the power of what’s going to happen and he was right—who would have thought?), but when you look at what’s going on with the four prisoners—now it used to be three, now it’s four—but when it was three and even now, I would have said it’s all in the messenger; fellas, and it is fellas because, you know, they don’t, they haven’t figured that the women are smarter right now than the men, so, you know, it’s gonna take them about another 150 years—but the Persians are great negotiators, the Iranians are great negotiators, so, and they, they just killed, they just killed us.”

The hilarity over his old speech came after the US Secret Service made an ominous statement following Trump’s suggestion it was okay to shoot one of their security protectees - Hillary Clinton.

The security force said it was “aware of the comments made earlier this afternoon”, a quote many believed was in direct response to Trump’s arguably most outrage declaration to date.

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