Gemma Collins was the undoubted highlight of Saturday night’s Jonathan Ross Show (sorry Naomi), and the TOWIE star’s appearance was as brilliantly ridiculous as we could have hoped… and then some.
Gemma is currently enjoying a whole new level of fame thanks to her all-too-brief appearance on Dancing On Ice, and she went all out to make an impression when she sat down for a chat with Jonathan.
First up, there was the all-new lewk…
The huge hair and bold outfits were replaced with a more dialled-down look. Was it an attempt to be taken more seriously? Did she want to give fellow guest Naomi Campbell a run for her money in the fashion stakes? Who knows? But accessorising with a glass of Chardonnay was a touch.
Speaking of Naomi…
Gemma wasn’t about to play it cool after finding herself sat next to the supermodel, and went full-on fangirl when she told her: “I am so honoured to be sitting here next to you, I’m just so not cool right now… You are my Queen, Naomi.” And you are ours, Gem.
The shameless name-dropping
“When I was in Paris, Oprah Winfrey was there, this top florist called Jeff [Leatham] who does all the flowers for the Kardashians. I’m really good friends with Jonathan Cheban, Chris Pratt was asked in an interview [about me].
Clang, claaang, CLAAAAANG!
Comparing herself to Lady Gaga, whilst talking about herself in the third person
“The GC is a bit like Lady Gaga, she’s a character,” Gemma explained. “I’ve become a caricature of myself.”
Uncanny.
Discussing her iconic two-day stint on I’m A Celebrity in front of current King of the Jungle, Harry Redknapp
“I was the first girl on TOWIE to get the jungle,” Gemma told Jonathan.
“That sounds like a terrible rash,” Jonathan replied.
The revelation that she wet herself at the BBC Teen Awards
If the indignity of that infamous fall through the stage at the 2017 BBC Teen Awards wasn’t enough, Gemma revealed that she also wet herself on stage once she’d dusted herself down.
″[I was] in shock and fear... I didn’t know what had happened,” she explained.
The toaster revelation
In an attempt to illustrate just how hard things were for Gemma growing up, she revealed she “never had a toaster”. Instead, she claimed she had to toast bread in front of an electric fire.
So if she ever gets married and you get invited to the wedding (please can we come Gem?), then you know what to get her.
(Not quite living) the American dream (yet)
“Since leaving Dancing On Ice I’ve had so many offers,” Gemma revealed. “But the one that really excites me is to go to America. But that’s not me going ’oh I want to be a big American Hollywood star.
“I’ve never been to LA,” she explained. “This is the cameras on me the minute I touch down in LA. I’m not saying I’m gonna rock up in America and be a big star... I would like a role in Game Of Thrones one day, I’m not gonna lie. I’m obsessed with the show. I’d do it for free.”
And we’d pay good money to see it become a reality.
Finally, she confirmed the news the whole country has been waiting for (no, not a Brexit deal)...
“I’m gonna skate like it’s the last day of my life,” she told the audience, before clicking the Z. Mind those nails Gemma.
The Jonathan Ross Show airs on Saturdays at 9.20pm on ITV. The Dancing On Ice final airs on Sunday at 6pm.