A man who claims he lost his penis in an accident when he was 12, has revealed a searingly intimate insight into his life without the organ.
Reddit user penisindoor(there’s your first clue to how this happened) revealed his story and eye wateringly-graphic pictures (seriously, you have to be sure you want to see this) during an Ask Me Anything (AMA) session on Tuesday.
Claiming to now be in his early 30s, penisindoor explained that his penis was indeed severed after it was slammed in a (presumably razor-sharp?) door.
In between sobs, we're imagining you would like to know how the hell does that even happen?
Well, boys will be boys apparently and he and his friends were larking around, when for a “joke” our hero poked his erect, still-intact penis through a crack in the door, inviting them to "give it a little kiss".
The LOLs quickly turned into OH-MY-GOD-THE-HORRORs when one friend responded by slamming the door and neatly lopping off the organ.
In penisindoor's own words:
“It was a scene of utter panic and mayhem. Your penis has a huge artery (well, I don't know about yours, per say) and it supplies a lot of blood.
"I had an erection the moment it happened so that was pumping in blood. If you can imagine, it was like a scene out of the Game of Thrones with the sheer level of blood that was everywhere.”
Life for penisindoor since that fateful day has certainly been different.
In his in-depth AMA he explain how he urinates, has sex (he has a girlfriend and he’s getting plenty thank you), achieves erections (of a sort), and probably most fascinating of all, his claim that he’s in line for a penile transplant.
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What’s more, he claims the penis-slayer from way back remains his friend and has bequeathed him his own penis in the event of his death.
Penisindoor also revealed he has reached out to fellow Redditor DoubleDickDude (who, yes, backed by pictorial evidence has a greedy TWO penises.)
Sadly: “He never responded. I was joking that he could lend me a spare, lol.”
Penisindoor, we salute you for sharing these remarkable pictures and we eagerly await news on your transplant.
H/T to Jezebel.