Mel B has said she is still suffering with the trauma from her previous marriage and has terrible flashbacks that drench her in “shame, sweat and fear”.
The Spice Girls star split from husband Stephen Belafonte in 2017 after 10 years of marriage. The sin claimed he had been emotionally and physically abusive during that time.
Stephen has always vehemently denied all allegations made against him.
In a new interview with The Sun, Mel talked about how she is still dealing with what she went through, having previously tried to block much of it out.
“Things happened between myself and my ex that I still don’t fully remember to this day because post-abuse trauma can last a lifetime,” she said.
“Nearly five years on I still wake up in the early hours with terrifying fragments of sounds and images flitting into my brain, things I’ve tried to block float to the surface — things that can still make me feel drenched in shame, sweat and fear.
“I’d been through so much and sunk so low that my self-esteem was zero, being isolated from my family, I had no one to confide in so I turned to drink and drugs to dull my pain.”
Mel said she could often not recall what happened to her while writing a book, Brutally Honest, about her experiences.
“The massive hangover of trauma from that relationship meant there was so much I could not remember,” she said. “My writer had to piece so much together from talking to my close friends, family and colleagues to fill in the gaps from my memory.
“To my horror I found out what my daughter, Phoenix, had witnessed. Knowing what my daughter saw kills me.”
Mel and her ex-husband split at the end of 2016, and finally had their divorce finalised a full 16 months after she first filed papers.
In a 2018 settlement, a judge ruled that Mel would have to pay her ex £270,000 in legal fees, in addition to £3,800 a month in child support, while both of them were ordered to set aside funds from the sale of their $8 million LA home to pay a tax bill.
Help and support:
If you, or someone you know, is in immediate danger, call 999 and ask for the police. If you are not in immediate danger, you can contact:
- The Freephone 24 hour National Domestic Violence Helpline, run by Refuge: 0808 2000 247
- In Scotland, contact Scotland’s 24 hour Domestic Abuse and Forced Marriage Helpline: 0800 027 1234
- In Northern Ireland, contact the 24 hour Domestic & Sexual Violence Helpline: 0808 802 1414
- In Wales, contact the 24 hour Life Fear Free Helpline on 0808 80 10 800.
- National LGBT+ Domestic Abuse Helpline: 0800 999 5428
- Men’s Advice Line: 0808 801 0327
- Respect helpline (for anyone worried about their own behaviour): 0808 802 0321