An appearance from Miriam Margolyes on This Morning usually means something outrageous is afoot, and we’re pleased to say she didn’t let us down during Thursday’s show.
Throughout her interview with presenters Phillip Schofield and Holly Willoughby, Miriam made it clear that she was deliberately acting on her best behaviour, while she promoted the new family film H Is For Happiness.
“What’s happened to you and where is Miriam Margolyes?” Phillip joked early on, to which the former Harry Potter star responded: “Well, bursting to get out, actually.”
As it turned out, it didn’t take long, and when the conversation turned to the actor’s past voiceover work, the Miriam we know and love soon crept out.
When asked how she’s been whiling away her hours during lockdown in Tuscany, Miriam explained: “I’m doing voice work. I’ve got a little studio rigged up in the back stable, out of five Ikea curtain rails and five Ikea duvets, and I’m crouching under the duvet and doing Wallace And Gromit, so I’ve got something on my mind.”
She then disclosed that she can currently be heard in an ad for “a haemorrhoid suppository”, at which point Phillip asked about her past work with Cadbury.
“I was the original Cadbury Caramel bunny,” Miriam recalled. “I remember they kept saying ‘make it sexier’, ‘make it sexier’. And, you know, first thing in the morning, it’s not what’s on your mind, really.”
A mischievous Phillip then asked: “Didn’t you possibly get that job out of a couple of other tapes that you might have done before that were slightly less family orientated?”
“I thought I was supposed to very careful this morning on this show, your chap told me, now don’t say anything nasty,” Miriam claimed, with Holly joking that her co-host was “poking you with a big stick” and trying to lead her astray.
It didn’t take much for her to spill the beans, though, with Miriam then declaring: “I did a couple of sex tapes. Sexy Sonia: Leaves From My Schoolgirl Diary, that was one of them.
“But I have to stress, they were audio tapes. They were not visual. And they were very exhausting, because when you’re simulating orgasm, as all of you out there know, it’s tiring, and you get a headache. It’s not a question of having a headache at the beginning, you get a headache at the end.
“So I haven’t done them again. I did the Cadbury bunny instead, and made a lot more money – because I only got paid £300 in those days.”
“It was at the Ann Summers sex shop,” she told the pair. “I expect you know it well. That’s where I auditioned.”
Oh, Miriam. Please never change.
This Morning airs every weekday from 10am on ITV.