Penis-Shaped Tree Turns Heads In Worcestershire

Neighbours Aren't Happy About This Man's Phallic 18ft Tree Sculpture
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Caters News Agency

Tree surgeon Chris Bishop has spent three years growing out a tree in his garden for a very special project, but his neighbours are less than pleased.

Cheeky Chris, of Bromsgrove, Worcestershire, has pruned the 25-year-old Cypress tree in his front garden to look like an 18 ft (5.5 metres) high penis.

The green-fingered 43-year-old told Caters: "No-one's commented when I've been out in the garden, people have just looked at it and walked past. I think it's because they're trying to work out whether it's just their dirty minds."

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Chris insists his intentions were to bring laughter and lighten the mood rather than to cause offence, but some locals aren't as amused as he is.

"Him and his mates thought it was hilarious," one unidentified neighbour said.

"I find it very offensive, remarks are always made by people coming past. People in the street are pretty upset about it, but our neighbours who told the council said nothing had been done.

"It's a massive eye-sore."

Despite the protests, Chris says he plans to grow the foliage out even more so he can add a pair of testicles to the sculpture.

Some passers-by aren't so affected by the gardener's phallus.

Neighbour Emily Cooper said: "To be honest with you once you’ve seen one you’ve seen them all!"

Regardless of what he plans to do with the tree, we just hope he keeps it trimmed around the base. That way it'll look a bit bigger.