Tomorrow I turn 30... I have a husband, a toddler, come from a typical [non 2.4] 21st century family, and having lived in London in my twenties, have just left my "dream job" to return home. And the punch line... I'm not sad or daunted. I feel hopeful, content and excited at once; grateful for what and who I have in my life, and glad to have the self-conviction to take risks, seek opportunities, and look to the future. Here's why I personally think no female should dread waving goodbye to 29 (irrespective of marital status or bank balance!) and realise how perfectly OK it is to turn 30:
At this stage in your life, you have probably the best bunch of people around you that you ever have had to date. The quality over quantity mantra has become reality, and those that you keep close mean the world to you! You have identified those who really don't add any positivity to your life and like a mature adult, you have learned to manage those connections, setting metaphorical boundaries to preserve your personal space - and sanity! As a result you have way less drama and downers encroaching on your life!
On the same vein, by the time you're pushing 30 you've probably managed to fine tune your BS radar, and more importantly learned not to waste precious time caring about it!
You always thought when elders said "school days are the best of your life" they were talking nonsense, and now you're finally of an age, where if you're like me, you can confirm the myth - they absolutely were! Regardless of whether you loved or loathed school days (my own best friends are indeed those from school #BFFs#cringe) you are mature and wise enough to know that life does get better and grow fuller as you get older.
You've overcome the bulk of the slog that was studying, exams, gaining experience, securing a job, or if you are really lucky a vocation! You now hopefully have in turn more respect, confidence and [fingers crossed!] earn more money at work than your younger self. In turn this might give you more security and less stress, happy days! And if this isn't the case, I'm sure it's because somewhere along the way you learned what really matters to you in life and prioritised accordingly! 'Hats off' to those who have put personal values before the pound!
Many of us spend our pre 30 years anxious at school about our appearance, comparing ourselves to peers, or worse still, peers doing the comparisons and critique for us! We went into our twenties feeling a little better, but not necessarily by much! By the time you're 30 you have had the first times, overcome embarrassments, and learned to be comfortable in your own skin. Moreover, you've learned the true meaning of intimacy in a relationship... and I don't mean peeing with the door open!
"A moment on the lips a life time on the hips" is no longer some corny phrase your mother or aunt uses, it's become current to you! But on the upside you are better understanding of your physical wellbeing, your body's needs as well as the mind, and can do something about it! It has become about health, vitality, energy, and feeling good in your self; not trying to look good to impress the opposite (or same!) sex, and keep up with the latest reality star that's trending! You may have more facial lines (in fact who are we fooling - be honest - you definitely have more!) and less of that youthful glow... and while we're at it, probably bigger bags under your eyes!... But the best bit is, you're old enough to care less, and embrace the amazing blessings in your life that have given you those, whether it be children, your career or partying; and be thankful for it all whatever!
A Saturday night in with a takeaway on the sofa no longer means you are a loser, or skint, it means you are a hard-working adult who enjoys, possibly even gets excited (perish the thought!) to sit in, do nothing and chill in its purest form because you've spent the rest of the week working your butt off! So 'cheers' to the Saturday night in, PJs on, make up off and drink in hand! You can enjoy a night to yourself at times, appreciate girlie get togethers and date nights so much more because the phrase 'everything in moderation' is one of life's genuine truths! Besides, Sunday's are for more than hugging a toilet, with 'beer fear' and flashbacks!!
By 30 you are conscious of time, years flying by at rapid speed, and accelerating with every additional one that passes. As a result of this adulthood awareness, you have the courage to stand up and grab hold of every opportunity possible. You're able to respectfully assert yourself and say "NO" when it's appropriate and reasonable to do so; even to the supreme beings that gave you life - the parents! There may have been some "oops!" moments along the way, but you have learned over this time how to 'keep it real' and not dislike yourself for it; to articulate your thoughts and feelings without being crude, crass, with compassion and class. And if you have a slip-up its OK, because you have also learned perspective, and not to sweat the small stuff!
The ultimate plus that comes hand in hand with entering your thirties is knowing YOU! You've likely invested the first 30 years of your life researching, developing and finally understanding yourself, even if only subconsciously! It's now time to take a deep breath, smile and toast (whether it be with a cocktail or coffee) to nailing the first 3 decades and relishing the next 3+ ahead!
E x