On Thursday people across the UK will form an orderly queue (that’s a line) at their local polling booth, vote, make a cup of tea and then complain about the weather. Four things that make this country the greatest on earth.
If what follows, a guide to the General Election for Americans, had been written a year ago, it would have been done so conscious of the fact that some of our ways may seem peculiar to you.
But then Trump happened and Americans now set the international standard for crazy, so all pretence of respectability and restraint is out.
Here goes...