In My Story, readers share their unique, life-changing experiences. This week we hear from Casey-Major Bunce, 32, who’s based in Portsmouth.
I always dreamed of becoming a mum, but the road to motherhood has not been without its challenges.
When I first became pregnant at 19, doctors scanned me and asked if I knew I had a heart-shaped womb. I didn’t. They told me it increased the likelihood of having a premature baby, but because I was only pregnant with one child they thought it would be fine.
My second child was conceived using clomid (a treatment for infertility) and IUI (or artificial insemination) because we couldn’t fall pregnant naturally again. When I found out I was expecting, I discovered it was with twins.
They told me at the time that because of the shape of my womb I wouldn’t be able to carry two babies. Sadly we lost my son’s twin, who stopped growing around eight weeks old.
We started IVF when I wanted a third baby. After three rounds and two embryo transfers, I fell pregnant again a year-and-a-half later.
We went for a scan at six weeks because the IVF clinic wanted to make sure there was a viable heartbeat. I was laying on the bed and was really poorly as I had the start of hyperemesis gravidarum (severe vomiting in pregnancy), which makes you feel like you want to die.
I was a bit out of it and the healthcare worker was having a look around with the probe and she started scanning one of the babies. My husband looked at me and went: “I’ve just seen two heartbeats.”
I couldn’t believe it and I turned around to the scanner and asked, “did he?” She checked and I could see it on her face. She went, “yep there’s baby one and there’s baby two.”
I told her I couldn’t be pregnant with twins because they’d only put one embryo in, but she suggested the embryo must’ve split. My husband was panicking because he knew that when you’ve got a heart-shaped womb, carrying one baby is difficult, let alone two.
We went to the room after to wait for our scan photos and he asked me: “What are we going to do?”
I had this calm come over me and I just knew it was going to be OK. I know it sounds weird but I just knew I could do it. I remember saying to him: “It’s going to be fine.” And even though I had this terrible sickness, we went straight out to Mothercare and bought two matching babygrows.
We’d already been through this heartache with my previous pregnancy which is why my husband was worried – we’d been there and done it and he didn’t think it would be possible for me to carry twins. But with the girls I just had a different feeling this time, I knew it was going to be alright.
That’s not to say my pregnancy was easy. I felt sick with my previous pregnancies, but with the girls it was on another level. It was horrendous. In the early stages of pregnancy, I was in hospital on and off for 16 weeks. I ended up getting a blood clot in my lung because I was so dehydrated. I was given medication, I was given injections and drips and pessaries.
It’s not just sickness. I couldn’t look at my phone. I couldn’t be near my kids. My other two boys made me feel physically sick. I couldn’t be around cooking. My kids used to try and give me a cuddle and I’d be retching because their smell just made me feel sick.
One time I vomited 27 times in one day. When I was about 16-17 weeks pregnant, they put me on steroids – and for me, that was life-changing. I was still sick but it was just about keeping it under control.
The chance of being able to carry twins and deliver them, and have two living children, is one in 500 million. Because they share a placenta it’s such a high-risk pregnancy – and then with a heart-shaped womb there’s not a lot of room in there. But I did it.
I had a planned C-section at 32 weeks because I’d experienced some bleeding. They tried to give me a spinal block however it didn’t work. There was a patch on my stomach where I could still feel, so they had to put me to sleep.
I couldn’t get up straight away after the birth, because I had lost a lot of blood. The girls were born at 11 in the morning and I never got to see them until the following evening.
It was difficult then, but I find it more difficult now. I feel sad when we have their birthdays because I think: I never held you or got to see you on the day you were born.
But it feels amazing that I was able to carry the girls to 32 weeks. I feel so incredibly lucky that I’ve got four living children.
My advice to other pregnant mums is: advocate for yourself. There have been so many times in my pregnancies where I’ve had to advocate for myself because the doctors haven’t listened to me. I’ve really had to push for things.
Casey Major-Bunce (@MajorBunceHome) is an influencer known for her life hacks and tips for mums. She was interviewed by Natasha Hinde and her answers were edited for length and clarity. To take part in HuffPost UK’s My Story series, email uklife@huffpost.com.