In honour of National Orgasm Day (31 July), we’re reflecting on all the reasons no one should ever feel pressured to fake the big O.
Trying to make convincing facial spasms and all the correct noises is downright exhausting - not to mention the other person at the end of it will NEVER LEARN.
So to remind yourself why you don’t want to do a When Harry Met Sally, here are the best reasons why faking it is not answer.
1. We’re not just there to pleasure our partner.
It’s 2016, not 1950 people. They might have finished but that doesn’t mean you need to pretend you did too.
2. Orgasms keep you youthful.
According to a study by Clinical Psychologist Dr. David Weeks at the Royal Edinburgh Hospital, people who orgasm four or more times a week look up to seven years younger.
So long anti-ageing moisturiser.
3. People know when you’re faking it.
A study at the University of Waterloo found that both men and women are “adept” at perceiving their partners’ level of sexual satisfaction. So everyone knows you’re a big fibber. But they don’t care ’cos guess what? They already got theirs.
4. You don’t want to be called a liar.
Yes you might feel like you’re being kinder to their feelings (or just getting things wrapped up quickly) but lying about sexual satisfaction can have a negative impact on trust in your relationship, both in and out of the bedroom.
Tracey Cox told The Huffington Post UK: “The absolute worst time to fake an orgasm is at the very start of a relationship - which is, of course, when most people do fake it.
“People don’t need to fake orgasms if their partner is realistic enough to accept that an orgasm isn’t going to happen every time you have sex.”
5. Orgasms relieve stress.
The human body is truly magical.
When we orgasm the hormone oxytocin is released from the brain into the bloodstream and this helps people feel warm and fuzzy and induces feelings of optimism, increased self-esteem and trust.
6. You’re not doing them any favours in the long run.
No one wants to think they’re God’s gift to sex when in actual fact everyone has been leading them down the garden path all these years.
Be the person who gives them the gift of a more enlightened sex life. And pay it forward to humankind because one day another poor sod may be at the receiving end of their terrible technique.
7. Orgasms help with insomnia.
Our brains release chemicals upon climax, which include oxycotin and vasopressin. These chemicals are associated with releases of melatonin, which help regulate your sleep.
8. It’s really bloody hard to not look like you’re faking.
Trust us. You’re one step away from looking as if you’re about to have a giant poo.
9. Faking orgasms is tied to insecurity about your partner cheating.
A study by Columbia University in New York found that pretending to orgasm was the most popular strategy employed by a woman to keep her partner from straying.
10. Sex is meant to be fun, not a test.
Whoever you’re spending it with, happy National Orgasm Day!