We realise society expects women to be fart-free, hair-free, elegantly swishing through life like a Pantene advert, but the reality is that we’re human, and therefore capable of all sorts of grubbiness and oddities.
Most of us prefer to shield our partners from this until we really need to (or they’re in love with us and therefore too invested to escape).
Reddit user Puga1505 posed the question as to what women get up to when their other half isn’t around and the results are AMAZING.
1. Slobbing
4. Hair Removal
“Stand in front of my magnifying mirror for hours and squeeze every pore and pluck every errant hair. It’s thrilling.”
- Weerrrd
“I’ll... pluck my ginger unibrow that I’ve managed to keep hidden from him for 3 years. And my three chin hairs.”
- jerden
“Shave my legs etc. Guys always want to take showers together, and I’m like I have some serious work to do in there leave me alone.”
“Boob pubes. Bubes. I pluck ‘em. There’s just like 4 or 5, I get rid of them before special occasions. Makes me feel extra fanceh.”
5. ‘Luxury Poops’
“I’m at a point where I know he wouldn’t care at all but it’s like I’m just so potty trained not to go at his place from earlier in the relationship, I can’t relax enough to do it until I’m in the comfort of my own bathroom.”
“I have luxury poops.... I’ll roll a joint, sit on the toilet, watch Netflix on my tablet, maybe bring in a coffee.... just poop for like 30 minutes. My bathroom is super comfy.”
7. Masturbate
“Ah the glorious feeling of just rubbing one out without having to worry about anyone else or cleaning up a mess.”
6. Quality Time With Boobs
“Play with my boobs. Like, nonsexy boob play like pushing them together or wiggling them one at a time while going “boing, boing,” things like that.”