The “terrible twos” got nothin’ on life with a “threenager” ― or so parents of 3-year-olds would have you believe.
It may seem surprising that someone so small could pack so much attitude, but threenagers prove it’s possible with their angst and emotional volatility. For parents dealing with this phase, Twitter offers a welcome escape.
Below, we’ve rounded up 33 relatable tweets about parenting threenagers.
“I’m not a threenager,” my three-year old son screams at the top of his lungs, during a threenager fit.
— Jake Sherman (@JakeSherman) November 19, 2020
The threenager just asserted her dominance by stuffing an entire pizza crust in her mouth as I reached for it and then walked to the trash and spit it out.
— Mom On The Rocks (@mom_ontherocks) May 15, 2019
Maintaining eye contact the entire time.
Parents everywhere: The Terrible Twos are so rough.
— let me momsplain (@letmemomsplain) June 30, 2020
Threenagers: Hold my juice.
1 way u know u have a #threenager? He's looking at the empty mailbox & screaming bec there's no mail in it & it's not even your mailbox.
— Toulouse and Tonic (@toulouseNtonic) April 21, 2015
Every night I make dinner and every night my threenager won't eat it in the most mundane and wasteful battle of wits ever recorded
— ~*Wellness Witchery*~ (@TheMandiEm) February 1, 2018
To every parent I chuckled at when they used the word “threenager.”
— Eric Smith (@ericsmithrocks) October 4, 2020
I’m sorry.
I get it now.
1. Look them directly in the eyes
— Mom On The Rocks (@mom_ontherocks) April 16, 2019
2. Don’t back down
3. Don’t make any sudden movements
4. Speak with authority
5. If all else fails, throw snacks to them
Me, explaining how to survive a threenager
My threenager caused me to put myself in time out for a cry during dinner today 🤪
— That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) January 6, 2020
When people say you’re gonna have a “threenager” when your kid turns three yrs old they aren’t lying. My son just saw that i had cheez-its in the pantry so he goes “oh my gosh are you kidding me? these are for me?” 😂
— Tiara Simone 🦋 (@artbytiara) January 21, 2019
My 3yo is crying because she asked me to draw a happy face and I had the AUDACITY to give it eyes AND a mouth.#momlife #threenagers
— The Salty Mamas (@saltymamas) August 29, 2018
Dressed up as an exhausted mom of 4 today. I went all out. I even had a threenager following me around screaming for more candy.
— Unfiltered Mama (@UnfilteredMama) November 1, 2018
Establish dominance over your threenager by getting her a bagel from the not as good place.
— Snarky Mommy (@SnarkyMommy78) August 28, 2019
It's 3 o'clock, do you know where your scissors are? Ugh. #threenager pic.twitter.com/52xp0CjXxK
— Christina Evans (@cakevans) January 22, 2017
You know that cute game where you say no and your threenager screams and then a helpful stranger says, “Just wait until they’re a teenager.”
— Molly England (@bluebonetbabies) May 26, 2018
And it is helpful because now your anger is aimed at the helpful stranger and not your kid.
The light at the end of the terrible two tunnel is the headlight of an oncoming train called the threenager.
— Parentalgrit (@ParentalGrit) September 13, 2018
Threenager: (noun)
— Mom On The Rocks (@mom_ontherocks) May 21, 2019
A three year old with all the emotional instability from the terrible twos but with more of a vocabulary, mixed with the rebellious attitude of a teenager.
Terrible twos is LIGHT work compared to having a threenager. The term terrible twos is an actual set up, you know. Three? Way tougher.
— Mattie James (@themattiejames) September 29, 2017
My 3yo is crying because I won't take her to get her picture taken with Santa.
— The Salty Mamas (@saltymamas) August 24, 2018
Today.
In August.#momlife #threenagers
Our little guy turned 3 yesterday.
— Richard Dean (@dad_on_my_feet) March 18, 2019
He also escaped his crib 17 times, threw 143 tantrums, and broke a snow globe, causing water to soak the pages of a favorite book.
I’m glad the “terrible twos” are over.
But this “threenager” stuff is going to kill me!#ToddlerForSale
If there's ever a moment of silence in your car, you are destined to blow it by pointing at something your threenager will somehow not see.
— The ParentNormal (@ParentNormal) July 18, 2020
G is whining because I won't turn out all the lights.
— Becky The Most Annoying Mom (@beckyhas4kids) December 27, 2018
The light he's referring to is the sun.
Toddlers are fun.#THREEnager #momlife
Created a “Zen Zone” for my girl to help us manage this “threenage” attitude & all the emotions that come along with it! 😩It was either this or one of us was gone have to move out ! 🗣🤣 Glad we went with the latter😌 #SocialEmotionalHealthInKidsMatters #PositiveDiscipline pic.twitter.com/zQLjDchMdu
— lady bridgerton (@amorDOUXshanola) March 23, 2021
My threenager has notified me that I’m no longer allowed to sing in the car.
— Mom On The Rocks (@mom_ontherocks) April 9, 2019
She did this by silently glaring at me with her arms folded.
She has got this passive aggressive thing down.
Lil: "You're crazy! You're making me crazy! You're totally crazy!"
— Ramblin Mama (@ramblinma) May 25, 2015
So this is why they call them "threenagers."
I'm having a Malibu and diet coke. So that should let you know how life with the threenager is going...
— Julia Sugarbaker is speaking (@JDSugarbaker) February 28, 2015
Threenager is an actual thing, you know. pic.twitter.com/NToqyB5dUA
— Hannah Michalak (@HannahMaggs22) April 1, 2017
My 3 year old told me she loved me but doesn’t like me and I honestly knew this was coming but did not think it would happen until she was a teenager.
— Mom On The Rocks (@mom_ontherocks) June 10, 2019
I’m not sure whether to be frightened or impressed with her ability to distinguish between the two. #threenager
The problem isn't the terrible twos or the threenager or the fournado, it's whatever age they decide they no longer need naps
— RubMor (@QBruby) January 18, 2021
If you don’t put your shoes on before your pants and then scream about it for 37 minutes, are you even a threenager?
— Bbeca - (Buh-becca) (@SaintFreckles87) June 9, 2019
Watching a threenager for two hours is like watching a theatre production of Die Hard.
— The ParentNormal (@ParentNormal) July 19, 2020
The threenager attitude is REAL you guys. It’s dangerous. I repeat, it. Is. Dangerous. 😂😂😭
— Probably know me as MarijuMama (@sarahbellamarie) April 7, 2020
3 yr old: “I stay in my big boy bed tonight, mommy, I promise.”
— Jamie Coleman, MD FACS (@JJcolemanMD) January 25, 2020
3 am in my bed every night: #threenager pic.twitter.com/rmH3lwRbr1
Can we stop with the “terrible twos” and “threenagers” and “FML fours” and just admit that kids are dicks until they move out?
— Arianna Bradford (@thearibradford) March 15, 2021