Hey, have you ugly cried yet today?
No?
OK, cool, let us help you out with that with this series of tweets from a South African paediatrician who asked his terminally ill patients — children, to be clear — what really matters in life. Their heartbreaking answers, which range from ice cream and the beach to spending time with their families, will make you re-evaluate your own priorities.
"Kids can be so wise, y'know," Alastair McAlpine, a palliative paediatrician in Cape Town, posted February 1 in a now-viral tweet.
For an assignment, I asked some of my terminal paediatric palliative care patients what they had enjoyed in life, and what gave it meaning. Kids can be so wise, y'know. Here are some of the responses (Thread).
— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
First of all, not one terminally ill child said they'd wished they spent more time watching TV or on Facebook, McAlpine wrote. None of them enjoyed fighting with others or being in the hospital. And many wished they'd spent less time worrying about what other people thought.
MANY wished they had spent less time worrying about what others thought of them, and valued people who just treated them 'normally'.
— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
'My real friends didn't care when my hair fell out.'
'Jane came to visit after the surgery and didn't even notice the scar!' /6
What did they enjoy? Their pets, ice cream, the beach, stories (especially those read to them by their parents), laughing, toys, time with family, and kindness.
MANY mentioned their pets:
— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
'I love Rufus, his funny bark makes me laugh.'
'I love when Ginny snuggles up to me at night and purrs'
'I was happiest riding Jake on the beach.'
/2
ALL of them loved ice-cream.
— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
/4
ALL of them loved books or being told stories, especially by their parents:
— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
'Harry Potter made me feel brave.'
'I love stories in space!'
'I want to be a great detective like Sherlock Holmes when I'm better!'
Folks, read to your kids! They love it. /5
Many of them loved swimming, and the beach.
— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
'I made big sandcastles!'
'Being in the sea with the waves was so exciting! My eyes didn't even hurt!' /7
Almost ALL of them valued kindness above most other virtues:
— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
'My granny is so kind to me. She always makes me smile.'
'Jonny gave me half his sandwich when I didn't eat mine. That was nice.'
'I like it when that kind nurse is here. She's gentle. And it hurts less' /8
Almost ALL of them loved people who made them laugh:
— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
'That magician is so silly! His pants fell down and I couldn't stop laughing!'
'My daddy pulls funny faces which I just love!'
'The boy in the next bed farted! Hahaha!'
Laughter relieves pain. /9
Kids love their toys, and their superheroes.
— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
'My Princess Sophia doll is my favourite!'
'I love Batman!' (All the boys love Batman)
'I like cuddling my teddy' /10
Finally, they ALL valued time with their family. Nothing was more important.
— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
'Mum and dad are the best!'
'My sister always hugs me tight'
'No one loves me like mummy loves me!' /11
"No one loves me like mummy loves me!" one child told McAlpine.
"I like cuddling my teddy," another child said.
The terminally ill children also expressed a lot of concern and worry about their parents, and how they would cope, McAlpine wrote.
MANY mentioned their parents, often expressing worry or concern:
— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
'Hope mum will be ok. She seems sad.'
'Dad mustn't worry. He'll see me again soon.'
'God will take care of my mum and dad when I'm gone'
/3
Listen to the life advice of these wise children, McAlpine urged.
Take home message:
— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
Be kind. Read more books. Spend time with your family. Crack jokes. Go to the beach. Hug your dog. Tell that special person you love them.
These are the things these kids wished they could've done more. The rest is details.
Oh... and eat ice-cream. /End
"Be kind. Read more books. Spend time with your family. Crack jokes. Go to the beach. Hug your dog. Tell that special person you love them," McAlpine wrote.
"These are the things these kids wished they could've done more. The rest is details. Oh ... and eat ice-cream."
McAlpine's tweets touched people around the world, including Canadian OB-GYN Jennifer Gunter.
That was beautiful. You do amazing things. I honestly am touched and am going to buy more ice cream for my kids and get back to reading to them. They are 14 but they can suck it up!
— Jennifer Gunter (@DrJenGunter) February 1, 2018
The children McAlpine spoke to were ages four to nine, he told BBC. McAlpine decided to train in children's palliative care after he noticed people didn't seem prepared for what to do with dying kids, he told BBC.
"The best part of my job now is that I get to meet these extraordinary children and families. I walk a special road with them," he said.
"As horrible as it is when a child dies, one of the best rewards is a dignified and pain-free death. If I can make their lives slightly less bad, it's worthwhile. That keeps me going."
Earlier On HuffPost Canada: