If you came away from watching Netflix’s Adolescence without feeling a sense of dread about parenting your children then you’re doing well.
The TV show follows the chilling case of 13-year-old Jamie, played by teen actor Owen Cooper, who is arrested on suspicion of murdering his classmate, Katie.
A lot happens over the four-part series – which touches on a range of themes, from struggling school systems and family dynamics, to masculinity and the rise of online misogyny – but it all culminates in us discovering that Jamie is guilty.
And it’s fair to say the story has touched a nerve with some parents – especially those raising teens in an increasingly digital world.
One parent took to Mumsnet recently to admit they’re “scared about having kids, especially boys, after watching Adolescence on Netflix”.
The parent said the TV series “terrified” them and added: “Seeing what teenagers, especially boys, go through in today’s world – social media, peer pressure, mental health struggles – makes me wonder how anyone navigates parenting without constant fear.”
“Am I overthinking,” they asked, “or do others feel the same?”
Some parents admitted to feeling the same way. One said they have a handle on what their two daughters need, but they don’t feel like they know how to navigate their son growing up.
“It really scares me. It’s like a world I don’t really understand now,” they added.
Another said: “YANBU [you are not being unreasonable], me and my DH [dear husband] are aware of the minefield we’ve got coming with the teenage years.
We’re going to try keeping our DC [dear children] distracted with activities they enjoy and limited screen time.”
Others didn’t understand the fuss, however. “Very few children go on to murder anyone. Parenting is hard but mostly works out fine,” said one Mumsnet user.
Many agreed that protecting their daughters is just as terrifying – after all, it was Katie who was stabbed to death and we know that online misogyny appears to be on the rise in schools.
“I’m more worried for my daughter. When my sons were getting ready for secondary I didn’t have to talk to them about which routes (in our safe leafy suburb) were safe walking routes,” said one parent.
“Protecting your children from others, particularly protecting your daughter from men, feels scarier.”
Parents share their advice for raising teens
In Adolescence, Jamie’s character struggles with feelings of isolation and low self-esteem, and there are also several hints that he’s been radicalised by online misogyny – alluded to through Katie’s use of incel emojis on his Instagram photos, and the eye-opening conversation between Jamie and psychologist Briony (Erin Doherty) in episode three.
We also discover that Jamie has had free rein to use the internet with little supervision in his bedroom – his mum (Christine Tremarco) admits in the final episode that she knew Jamie used to sit on his computer until the early hours – and he was allowed to be out roaming the streets until late at night.
On Mumsnet, parents shared their advice for raising teens in an increasingly digital world. Here’s what they had to say:
- Spend quality time with them
- Encourage them to have hobbies
- Teach them to think critically
- Promote open communication and regularly check in
- Encourage and normalise emotional expression – model this yourself
- Teach healthy coping mechanisms
- Set curfews so they are home by a reasonable time
- Set parental controls on social media and phones/computers
- Discuss healthy use of social media and set limits on screen time
- Encourage them to spend time with positive male role models
- Keep devices out of bedrooms.
All four episodes of Adolescence are streaming now on Netflix.