Big Sean has spoken candidly about seeking specialist help for anxiety and depression, after he realised meditation wasn’t working for him anymore.
This time last year, the American rapper cancelled a tour of North America –explaining at the time that he needed to focus on his music in the studio, while also citing poor mental health.
In three separate videos posted on Instagram, he recalled how he had to take a step back in his life to try and figure out what was happening. “I wasn’t feeling like myself and I couldn’t figure out why,” he said. “I just felt lost. And I don’t know how I got there.
“I’ve been meditating since I was 17 years old, [and] that helps with anxiety, depression, all those things that I’ve felt in my life. But it wasn’t doing it all the way through this, so I knew it required some special attention.”
Sean started therapy, which he said helped him realise he needed some clarity in his life – “clarity about who was around me, what I was doing.”
Shortly after his 30th birthday, Sean said even music – which had always brought him happiness and provided an “escape” – started to feel like a burden.
He decided to readdress the relationships he had with other people – of which he said he had a lot of “toxic” ones – and also the relationship he had with himself.
“I realised it all started with me and I had to analyse myself,” he said. “I couldn’t point the finger at anybody else, I had to point it at myself, and nurture those relationships that were important to me but most importantly, nurture the relationship with myself.”
Sean worked on enjoying spending time alone. ”[I’m] kind of realising that you can’t give or depend on somebody for love or a good time, and all that, if you can’t give it to yourself,” he said.
“I started doing things by myself, just doing things I never thought I’d do like going sky-diving, whatever I thought was fun. And in the midst of that I definitely rediscovered myself and found a whole new energy – and me being the source of it, not somebody else.”
Since seeking help, he revealed he’s now making “some of the best music” of his life – his previous album, I Decided, came out in February 2017.
“Put energy back into yourself, be clear about what you want to do and who you want to do it with,” he added, “it all translates to happiness.”
Useful websites and helplines:
Mind, open Monday to Friday, 9am-6pm on 0300 123 3393
Samaritans offers a listening service which is open 24 hours a day, on 116 123 (UK and ROI - this number is FREE to call and will not appear on your phone bill.)
The Mix is a free support service for people under 25. Call 0808 808 4994 or email: help@themix.org.uk
Rethink Mental Illness offers practical help through its advice line which can be reached on 0300 5000 927 (open Monday to Friday 10am-4pm). More info can be found on www.rethink.org.