When it comes to magazines, I always start from the back. Not only do they seem somehow weightier that way, but starting at the front you have to wade through 30 pages of ads, a contents page (dull, dull, dull...) and an editor's letter (these are almost always skippable, especially when they run for more than a page; pointing at you, US Vogue) before getting to any real words. After all that, my £4 for the lot seems a bit of a waste.
I have a friend who has to sniff them first to fully consume the swoon-full print fumes, but a quick scan from back-to-front after shaking out those gaudy "Subscribe now!" leaflets works for me. That and then immediately pitching into the contributors' page: dip-in material at its yummiest.
The thing with magazines is that you get stuck in your ways. I'm a huge ELLE fan so switching from the sharp clean lines of their contributors' page (filled with photographers, novelists, artists and journalists) to the clutter of Vogue's photo-heavy offering, or Company's snappy version filled with staffers and readers, it can be a bit jarring.
How do they come up with such pithy, life enhancing tips off the cuff? The reason I'm not yet headily pouring out words for such magazines? My life tips just wouldn't be up to scratch.
Then again, if hilarious Life! Death! Top Tips! Tumblr account proves anything the ridiculous and warped ideas have almost all been nabbed so one day I'll definitely be able to formulate some incredible, must-have knowledge to share with the world.
Unlike the horrible logic of ITV2 producers, whose brainstorming sessions have recently thrown up an idea that involves "reality TV" and "journalism hopefuls" in the same distressing sentence.
Feeling sick? Yep, me too. Really Bauer, really? And I definitely expected better from you Empire. Journalism is a tough enough talent show as it is, why turn it into trash-TV fodder and narrow the chances of 'making it' even more?