Infidelity statistics make for a pretty sobering read. In a UK study of 2,000 people, one group found that one in five of us have cheated on our partners ― and of those who cheated, almost half did so more than once.
None of us like to be cheated on, and suspecting that your partner isn’t faithful can be equally as tough, but catching a cheater can be near impossible when you are dealing with a deceitful person.
So, who better to hear from than Private Investigator Aaron Bond from Bond Rees Private Investigations, who has shared the most common signs detectives use to uncover someones infidelity with HuffPost UK.
They become more interested in you
We’ve all been in relationships where things start to fizzle out, but if your relationship has been on the rocks for a while, and then suddenly it becomes more exciting again, it could well be a tactic to trick you.
Aaron says: “We’ve seen this a lot in our time as private investigators, a relationship doesn’t seem to have that spark anymore and then all of a sudden it does.
“While I’m sure sometimes this can be genuine as someone may be trying to fight to keep their relationship alive, in my experience it’s often used to cover up their tracks of them cheating on you.”
According to Aaron, you might find that you’re the receiver of more kind gestures than normal – a tactic used to divert the attention from the cheater’s wrongdoing.
Additional email accounts
Some cheaters may have additional phones that they hide somewhere, but more often than not you should be more worried about additional hidden email addresses and social media accounts.
“Cheaters sometimes have other phones that you may not know about, but they nearly always have additional emails and social media accounts you don’t know about,” Aaron explains.
“With additional accounts, they can hide everything from you, including their messages, naughty images and everything else in between. While it’s difficult to find if your partner has other accounts, what you may notice is that they almost become defensive around you with their phone. They may be cautious of opening certain apps or they may shield the phone away from you.”
They start travelling for work more
There’s nothing wrong with travelling for work, and it may seem cliché, but it can be used as a way to cover up an affair.
“Deceitful people will use the ruse of work to cover up their cheating tracks simply because it’s hard to prove otherwise,” Aaron shares.
So how can you identify whether there is cheating going on? Aaron explains that what you need to look out for is a pattern that is out of the ordinary for them: “Have they all of a sudden started to stay late on a certain day or time of the month?
“What we find is that when people cheat they tend not to do it in their local area, and will go a few towns across so no one knows them and they can get away without being spotted. An overnight stay with work is a perfect alibi for this.”
Using cash more than usual
Cheaters can’t pretend to be in one place if their bank statement shows them to be somewhere else – so it’s out with the bank card and in with the cash.
“While using cash isn’t a red flag, if you have a joint account or have access to each other’s statements and you see more cash withdrawals than usual then it’s a sign that your partner is hiding something.
“Cash is often used to purchase gifts, pay for meals or overnight stays without leaving behind a paper trail. Cheaters will often create fake expenses to account for these cash withdrawals and it’s often what gets them caught.
Having to lie about where and when they spent their money can be difficult to remember and cheaters often get their stories mixed up,” says Aaron.
Ah, the joys of relationships...