It’s pretty difficult to get in “the mood” when your stomach is playing up, yet again.
Bloated, gassy, constipated, acid reflux, diarrhoea – these are not exactly the sexy feelings you might want, especially ahead of Valentine’s Day.
But, if this is you, don’t worry.
Health insurance company Bupa believes that between one and two people in every 10 in the UK have irritable bowel syndrome (IBS), and it mostly starts to develop between the ages of 20 and 30.
It adds that women are twice as likely as men to report having IBS symptoms.
According to Forbes, this could come down to female hormones, which trigger contractions in the intestines particularly around your period.
Anxiety can also trigger IBS issues – and the UK Mental Health Foundation claims women are twice as likely to be diagnosed with anxiety as men.
A OnePoll survey for gut health supplement Symprove looked at 2,000 nationally representative people in the UK, and found 115 respondents said they were struggled with such symptoms.
How many people struggle with their sex life due to gut issues?
Out of all of Symprove’s participants, 67% of women said they felt insecure about having sex with someone because of IBS symptoms or general bloating.
The survey also found 62% of women would even cancel a date they had in the diary if they were suffering with IBS symptoms.
That’s not surprising, considering that 42% of female respondents saying they would be too embarrassed to pass wind in front of partner too.
Symprove and OnePoll also found that the average woman in the survey lacked body confidence around 15 days a month, with 60% saying this was due to bloating, and 62% due to clothes not fitting properly.
The real-life impact
One case study, who preferred to remain anonymous because of the sensitive topic, told HuffPost UK just how these problems can have a serious impact on your personal relationships.
She explained that, at least “a few times a month”, she chose not to have sex with her partner because of these issues. She’s been suffering with IBS since she was 20 – she’s now 32.
“Bloating, constipation and heartburn are all symptoms that I have suffered with, which stopped me from being intimate with my partner and caused a loss of libido.
“Nowadays, if I’m ever having a particularly bad flare-up, I won’t have sex at all, which puts a real strain on my relationship.”
She explained that if she does have slight symptoms of IBS, she’ll only do “certain sex positions that will ensure I don’t pass wind”, such as missionary.
“Despite this, I’ll still feel very tense and uncomfortable if I am having a flare up, as I’m so conscious of it, which can make me feel really unsexy and has even gone as far as impacting my self-esteem.”
“It’s been quite a rollercoaster especially as my symptoms can come on quite suddenly and catch me off guard.”
While she said she was lucky enough to have a strong network around her, she added: “I do think there’s still a massive stigma around IBS, the symptoms can be quite challenging and intimate due to it concerning mainly your bowel functions, which results in many deciding not to speak on it at all.”
She added: “There should be no shame surrounding IBS.”
How can you relieve it?
As the NHS website explains, there is no single diet or medication that works for everyone with IBS or IBS-like symptoms.
However, there are some general bits of advice which work for some people.
- Cook homemade meals with fresh ingredients
- Keep a diary of what you eat and symptoms you get, so you can avoid anything that triggers your IBS
- Try to relax
- Remember to exercise regularly
- Try probiotics for a month
- Try to avoid fatty, spicy or processed foods
- Do not eat more than three portions of fresh fruit a day
- Don’t delay or skip meals
- Don’t drink lots of alcohol or fizzy drinks
- Try not to eat too quickly
- Don’t drink more than three cups of tea or coffee a day
- Cut down on high-fibre foods like wholegrain foods
The NHS also advises people eat oats regularly to avoid bloating, cramps and farting, with up to one tablespoon of linseed a day.
Try to avoid foods which are hard to digest (e.g. brussel sprouts), anything which contains a sweetener called sorbitol, and if you get diarrhoea, make sure you drink lots of water.
To relieve constipation, you can also increase the soluble fibre you eat.
The case study said doing a low-intensity workout was effective for her, too.
Find out more on the NHS website, speak to your local pharmacist or GP for more specialist advice.