Joe Lycett Says It Feels 'F***ing Fantastic' To Cause Mayhem For MPs As He Reveals Personal Reason Behind Sue Gray Spoof

"I suppose like thousands of others with their own stories, I’m angry."
Joe Lycett
Joe Lycett
Simone Padovani/Awakening via Getty Images

Joe Lycett has said it feels “fucking fantastic” to have reportedly caused ‘chaos’ and ‘mayhem’ for the government, as he shared his deeply personal reason for penning a spoof Sue Gray report that some ministers apparently fell for.

Earlier this week, the comedian wrote his own version of the civil servant’s much-anticipated report into alleged parties and gatherings across Downing Street and Whitehall while the country was living under restrictions.

While it was clear to see it was a parody, Joe claimed to have received a message from a verified cabinet source who said his faked report was read “as a serious leak” and had staff “literally running around panicking” calling MPs.

He also got one over on culture secretary Nadine Dorries, who briefly retweeted (and hastily deleted) a post from the comic jokingly claiming to be on Boris Johnson’s side “no matter what”.

In a personal post on his social media, Joe explained how he had written the posts out of anger, having not been able to be there when he lost his best friend to cancer early into lockdown because he was “following the rules” – at a time when some minsters were seemingly having parties.

BREAKING: Leaked Sue Gray report reveals shocking abuse of the rules. Hard to see how the PM can cling on after this. pic.twitter.com/l0IQMcio0t

— Joe Lycett (@joelycett) January 27, 2022

This is an actual series of messages I have received from someone who works for a cabinet minister. Source is verified. pic.twitter.com/PVfCCjJMQL

— Joe Lycett (@joelycett) January 27, 2022

He wrote: “I’m angry right now probably for the same reason many other people are angry. In the early stages of lockdown in 2020 my best friend died from cancer.

“He was the person who had been with me through my journey in comedy the most closely; he had been to the smallest pub gigs all the way up to the Apollo and when I was first on Graham Norton. He had been ill for a number of year and towards the end I had helped as a part time carer. I watch him slip away, gradually, over months, and all that comes with it.

“It’s a long story for another time. But he died, at the start of lockdown, and I wasn’t there because I was following the rules, and we had a tiny insufficient funeral because we were following the rules, and I drove his kids away from that funeral back to Birmingham without any sort of wake, because we were following the rules, and it felt unnatural and cruel and almost silly, but we did it because we followed the rules.

“So I suppose like thousands of others with their own stories, I’m angry about that.”

Joe went on to explain that while he had never voted for the Tories as some of their values were at odds with his own as a “somewhat lefty wanker”, he’d previously “respected their approach” in some areas and was “not in the business of trashing them for the sake of it”.

However, he said Boris Johnson’s “lot” are “about power and little else”.

🤪 pic.twitter.com/OPI0tlXl47

— Joe Lycett (@joelycett) January 28, 2022

He continued: “They torch traditions and institutions with ease if it helps them retain their grip. To hell with my dead friend, they think, and all your dead friends and dead relatives. You followed the rules and we didn’t but we’re in power and that’s all that matters so spin on it.

“So I get angry and write a few jokes about Sue Gray’s report, a report which will probably change nothing and we’ll all be here again in the not too distant future, in some other scandal, with some other liars,” he said.

“But for now you might wonder how it feels to have been described in the papers as having caused these people ‘chaos’ and ‘mayhem’ and ‘mass panic’ because of a few jokes.

“Let me be clear: it feels absolutely fucking fantastic.”

Joe penned a spoof of Sue Gray's much-anticipated report, which some in government reportedly fell for
Joe penned a spoof of Sue Gray's much-anticipated report, which some in government reportedly fell for
Ollie Millington via Getty Images

Sue Gray began her eagerly-awaited report earlier this month, amid claims of illegal lockdown gatherings at Downing Street.

Since then, several more allegations have been reported in the media, including the most recent, involving a group supposedly celebrating Boris Johnson’s birthday at No 10 in June 2020.

Joe’s post comes after it was revealed the Metropolitan Police have asked Gray to water down aspects of report so as not to prejudice their own investigation, which was announced earlier this week.

The move has been heavily criticised and means the Gray report is likely to be further delayed.

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