Ecology Professor Theorizes Loch Ness Monster May Just Be Whale Penis

The theory is arousing, er, interest.
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An ecology professor has just come up with a theory about the Loch Ness Monster that is sure to stimulate controversy.

Michael Sweet, who is a professor in molecular ecology at the University of Derby, recently suggested on Twitter that “Nessie” isn’t a monster at all, but just a whale penis.

Sweet said that many sea monster stories reported by explorers were inspired by what he called “tentacled and alienesque appendages emerging from the water.”

But while many of the observers may have believed the appendages breaking the ocean surface might be part of something “more sinister lurking beneath,” Sweet said that in many cases, “it was just whale dicks.”

Back in day, travellers/explorers would draw what they saw. This is where many sea monster stories come from ie. tentacled and alienesque appendages emerging from the water - giving belief to something more sinister lurking beneath....however, many cases it was just whale dicks. pic.twitter.com/6ZH1nJZvB1

— Prof. Michael Sweet (@DiseaseMatters) April 8, 2022

Whales often mate in groups so while one male is busy with the female the other male just pops his dick out of the water while swimming around waiting his turn. Everyone’s gotta have a bit of fun, right?

— Prof. Michael Sweet (@DiseaseMatters) April 8, 2022

One female whale is typically paired with a primary escort (male) and a group of males will try to fight for their right to overthrow the escort and earn mating rights. A competition pod can have just a handful of whales or a larger group of 12-15.

— Prof. Michael Sweet (@DiseaseMatters) April 8, 2022

Sadly, Nessie was unavailable to comment on the whale penis hypothesis, but, to be fair, its just the latest theory to pop up about the probably mythical Scottish creature.

Back in 2019, researchers suspected the creature was really a giant eel, while one local man claimed it was just a giant catfish.

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