Matt Willis has opened up about how he was taking as much as six grams of cocaine a day after relapsing in 2016.
The Busted musician, who is married to TV presenter Emma Willis, is appearing in a new BBC documentary about his struggles with drugs and alcohol, in which he speaks candidly about relapsing during his band’s UK tour.
Matt has a history of addiction, and became sober prior to his wedding in 2008, before he began using again eight years later.
He explained how he was offered cocaine backstage at a gig, which he accepted, having already been drinking at the time.
“Cocaine wasn’t a problem for me, alcohol was my downfall,” he said. “Within a month I was doing six grams, bang, bang, bang, on my own, every fucking day and not coming home until three in the morning, pretending I was working on an album, which I wasn’t really writing.
“I was making... music in a studio doing coke.”
Matt continued: “It was straight back to that shame cycle, the shame of relapse, the same of letting everyone down, the shame of using uncontrollably trying to stop and not being able to.”
The performer, who is now completely sober, said he believed Emma would leave him “many, many times” at the height of his struggles.
“I’m so grateful she didn’t and that she could see something in our relationship that was worth holding on to. And it was - we have three kids, and we’re very happy,” he said.
“It’s always hard to hear other people telling your wife to get out, but understandably at the time.”
He added: “I’m terrified of relapse. If I do that again everything will end.”
Emma also contributed to the documentary, and admitted she was “so scared he might die”.
She also said she had never expected Matt to relapse as he “had been doing so well for such a long time”.
“It was the last thing I thought,” she said.
Matt Willis: Fighting Addiction airs on Wednesday at 9pm on BBC One and iPlayer.
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