Mum-Of-Six Still Finds The Time To Be Funniest Woman On Twitter

We can't even drink a hot cup of tea.

Every parent knows that it only takes one child in your house to make you feel like your life is going into complete meltdown, you’ll never be in control or drink a hot beverage ever again.

But one mum, Stephanie Ortiz or ‘Six Pack Mom’ as she is known, from Long Island, USA, is putting the rest of us to shame by not only juggling six children (yeah, we know) but being constantly hilarious on social media.

The social media queen told Buzzfeed: “My original life plan involved too many cats, too many books, and no kids. But I fell head over heels in love with my husband and we decided to have a baby after a year of marriage. That went so well that we decided, we could totally handle two kids! (And three, and four, and…).”

Here are some of her funniest moments online.

Kids are already up, & I'm sliding into my Sunday morning like: pic.twitter.com/NHrw4lQs8n

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) March 5, 2017

When you ask a teenager to clear their own dinner plate. pic.twitter.com/w8kYvK7Lox

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) March 5, 2017

When you've reached kid bedtime & the day's finish line is finally in sight... then you hear: "I peed in my bed." pic.twitter.com/2Gz4BJqF7h

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) February 28, 2017

Kids: "Yay!! Another snow day tomorrow! School's cancelled!"

Me: pic.twitter.com/iXNN7QU5cS

— Six Pack Mom (@Six_Pack_Mom) February 9, 2017

It's so nice out! Let's take a nature walk so the kids can complain that nature has no wifi.

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) April 2, 2017

Me: "It's bedtime; did you brush your teeth?"

7 yr old: "Yes- here, smell."

LIAR. pic.twitter.com/tq0jpogp2d

— Six Pack Mom (@Six_Pack_Mom) February 3, 2017

My 3 y.o. watched hours of Baby Einstein & I just caught him trying to eat cat food, so that "make your baby a genius" idea didn't pan out.

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) April 2, 2017

What's bedtime look like for a parent of toddlers?

This sums it up nicely. pic.twitter.com/wFznWt588s

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) March 30, 2017

Monday mornings as a stay-at-home parent are kind of like cleaning up after a massive house party that you weren't even invited to.

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) March 27, 2017

My mom gave my 4 year old a jumbo pack of Legos for his birthday because obviously she hates me & wants me to die.

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) March 27, 2017

Me: "Did you empty the dishwasher?"
11 y.o: "I put all the dishes away, but I don't think it was run first."
Me: pic.twitter.com/b06bG5XIVb

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) March 29, 2017

Saw a company truck advertising their mobile zoo, which is a pretty apt description of my own minivan's inhabitants.

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) March 29, 2017

Oh, next week's spring break? As in, no school for the kids? All week? pic.twitter.com/WzZgd66csf

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) April 4, 2017

When the kids are supposed to be winding down after dinner, but are doing the exact opposite. pic.twitter.com/yTbgxy7GyU

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) April 3, 2017

If you've never considered faking your own kidnapping & hopping on a plane rather than grocery shopping for your family,

you're not me.

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) March 25, 2017

Me: researches healthy meal planning & nutritious family cooking.

Also Me: orders pizza b/c spent too much time researching healthy meals.

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) March 24, 2017

Describe what the hour before the kids' bedtime is like? Hmm.. let's see... sort of...

Oh, right. Just like THIS. pic.twitter.com/sy8CJyUb4W

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) January 11, 2017

What's bedtime with multiple kids feel like?

THIS. pic.twitter.com/f9AMr4aXNT

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) March 18, 2017

"Sorry my son was late to school- he woke up late."

(REALITY:
"Sorry my son was late to school; his mom woke up late.")

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) March 21, 2017

Kids: "Yay!! Another snow day tomorrow! School's cancelled!"

Me: pic.twitter.com/iXNN7QU5cS

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) February 9, 2017

Me: "Time for dinner, kiddos!"

Kids, eyeing dinner: "Ew... that looks gross."

Me: "I see. In that case..." pic.twitter.com/zVUwVgt2jp

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) January 11, 2017

Shout out to my anonymous family member for "helping".

(Reason #479 why my most whispered phrase is "WTF?") pic.twitter.com/QewIH34bov

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) January 11, 2017
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