It’s thought as many as one in three mums who give birth may experience birth trauma – a shorthand phrase for those who experience post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) symptoms after childbirth.
While PTSD is often associated with war veterans, anyone who experiences a traumatic event can go on to struggle with symptoms or receive a diagnosis. And for some new parents, birth can be a matter of life or death.
“In most cases, what makes birth traumatic is the fear that you or your baby are going to die,” says The Birth Trauma Association, a charity that supports parents who have experienced traumatic birth.
It estimates about 30,000 women a year in the UK experience postnatal PTSD, and may more have symptoms of psychological distress after birth.
“We very often see birth trauma in women who have lost a lot of blood, for example, or who had to have an emergency caesarean because their baby’s heart rate suddenly dipped,” adds the charity.
This Birth Trauma Awareness Week (July 16-22), parents are taking to social media to share what helped them heal from birth trauma using the hashtag #HelpingMeHeal. Here are some of their stories.
‘Speaking to a professional who specialised in birth trauma made so much difference’
“My journey to recovery from PTSD began with the acknowledgement that I hadn’t been feeling like ‘myself’ for four to five months after the birth of my son in May 2020. I was constantly consumed by the horror, desperation and helplessness I felt in hospital. I felt broken, anxious and irritable and struggled to bond with my son.
“I eventually contacted the GP, who referred me for psychological support and I started sessions with a perinatal clinical psychologist. Talking about what happened helped me to process the sadness, anger and guilt I was feeling about my son’s birth. It was the first time that I felt properly heard, validated and understood.
“Speaking to a professional who specialised in birth trauma made so much difference and I was slowly able to come to terms with what I’d been through. Along with talking therapy, we also did the ‘rewind technique’ which helped to reprocess the traumatic memory and remove the intense emotions associated with it.
“I also started writing poems about my birth trauma, which was quite therapeutic. Although I’ll never forget what happened, I can now think back to my son’s birth without feeling the horror associated with it.”
– Neya Joshi, 32, Croydon
‘Physical exercise was a game-changer’
“After two traumatic births my healing has come from many things which work together to help me. Talking about it openly was the first step, particularly with others who have experienced birth trauma, as you start to understand you’re not alone, different or weak.
“Taking medication (antidepressants), which I understand is not for everyone, worked for me and allowed me to get more clarity and headspace to move on.
“It’s a cliché, but physical exercise was a game-changer as a way to rid my body of adrenaline and cortisol, stimulate endorphins and just get time to myself which, for mums of young children, is always important.”
– Kath Myers, 43, London
‘Hypnotherapy helped me be present again’
“Healing has been a torturous journey for me. My biggest hurdle was getting a correct diagnosis – mental health professionals advised a postnatal depression (PND) diagnosis would mean quicker support, despite treatment for PTSD birth trauma being so very different from PND. In fact, talking therapies for PND can make PTSD more intense and difficult to manage.
‘Talking with other people going through it helped me feel less isolated’
“I began my healing journey with long NHS wait lists for counselling and many setbacks to intervening support from the health visitors – but the first milestone came when my baby turned two and my psychiatrist suggested I could access my hospital notes and have a debrief with the midwives involved in my care.
“I began to read ferociously about PTSD and anxiety. I found Dr Bessel van der Kolk’s book The Body Keeps The Score – in it he detailed several paths to healing for trauma symptoms. I tried them all.
“Yoga was a game-changer. PTSD relies on a disconnect from the mind and body. The body is still in a state of panic from the trauma and can’t move on, so in order to survive the mind disconnects. Yoga was all about being in your body, breathing into your body, sensing discomfort in a position, listening to your body. I would cry after a session, sometimes for as long as the session.
“I also joined the Birth Trauma Association and talking with other people navigating a similar landscape of trauma survival helped me feel less isolated. Helping others navigate their own milestones made me sleep better at night.
“Slowly the debilitating symptoms I had – disassociation, panic attacks, depression, anger bursts, nightmares, flashbacks – began to recede and, in 2022, four years (almost to the day) past my traumatic birth, I said goodbye to the EMDR therapy that changed my life and I no longer have symptoms related to PTSD.
“When I feel low emotionally, when I feel panic setting in or when I know life is just a little too stressful or busy, I return to the yoga for peace.”
– Leone Cunningham, 42, London
‘I turned my pain into purpose to help me heal’
“Turning ‘pain into purpose’ has helped me heal from the birth trauma I experienced in 2019, when I nearly lost my son in the events leading up to a crash emergency C-section under general anaesthetic.
“I have done this by becoming a peer-supporter for the Birth Trauma Association and it brings me so much satisfaction in helping other women feel better, telling them the things I wish someone had told me when I was in the midst of my trauma, and seeing them come out the other side and get back in touch months or sometimes years later to say how well they are getting on.
“I have also worked with a team at my local hospital to implement new practices for women delivering a baby under general anaesthetic – we have created a memory booklet that will provide families with key information about their birth, like what time they met their baby, who delivered their baby, who held their baby and cared for them when they couldn’t. This also includes early photos, which traditionally women delivering under general anaesthetic would have missed out on. These were things I was desperate to have after my birth, but weren’t available and you can never get them back.
“Turning ‘pain into purpose’ has helped me heal as I have used my experiences to help others and make tangible improvements to maternity care. History doesn’t have to repeat itself when it comes to birth trauma.
“I know this first hand, as I was fortunate enough to have a second baby a couple years later in a wonderfully healing birth via elective C-section. Back in 2019 I felt like I might never be happy again, that I would never bond with my baby or be a good mum. Nearly five years later, I couldn’t be happier with my two children and am proud of the mum I have become. Healing is possible.”
– Katie Plant, 37, Hampshire
Help and support:
- Mind, open Monday to Friday, 9am-6pm on 0300 123 3393.
- Samaritans offers a listening service which is open 24 hours a day, on 116 123 (UK and ROI - this number is FREE to call and will not appear on your phone bill).
- CALM (the Campaign Against Living Miserably) offer a helpline open 5pm-midnight, 365 days a year, on 0800 58 58 58, and a webchat service.
- The Mix is a free support service for people under 25. Call 0808 808 4994 or email help@themix.org.uk
- Rethink Mental Illness offers practical help through its advice line which can be reached on 0808 801 0525 (Monday to Friday 10am-4pm). More info can be found on rethink.org.