When you face a bereavement, it can feel like the impacts of it are endless.
Between death admin, fielding well-meaning sympathies and actually addressing the loss yourself, it can be a painful process.
It’s also not linear — one day you can feel like you’re finally through the ‘worst’ of your loss and the next, your day is ruined by a small thing reminding you of the huge loss you are experiencing.
However, according to Bianca Neumann, assistant director of bereavement at national palliative care and bereavement charity, Sue Ryder, there are some physical symptoms of loss that we may have been missing.
The physical symptoms of loss
Neumann says: “Grief is often unpredictable. A song, a scent or memory can bring emotions rushing back, making you feel out of control.
“Administrative things, like receiving unpaid bills, and financial pressures can add to this feeling, making processing your grief harder and lead you into a cycle of stress.”
Stress in itself is a concerning issue. On the Mental Health Foundation website, the charity’s director Isabella Goldie said: “Stress is a significant factor in mental health problems, including anxiety and depression.
“It is also linked to physical health problems like heart disease, problems with our immune system, insomnia and digestive problems.”
Speaking to UCLA Health, George Slavich, PhD, director of the Laboratory for Stress Assessment and Research at the Semel Institute for Neuroscience and Human Behavior at UCLA urges that bereavement can even impact our immunity to infections and disease.
Dr Slavich says: ”[Following a stressful loss], your immune system lowers its antiviral defense system, making your body more vulnerable to viral infections. If you’ve ever come down with a cold after a stressful time, you may have experienced this response,”
He explains that this results in heightened inflammation, which for some individuals, may last for a long period of time. This inflammation can lead to a variety of psychological and behavioral symptoms, including feelings of sickness, fatigue, loss of pleasure, and social and behavioural withdrawal.”
If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone, even if it feels that way.
Sue Ryder has found that 88% of people feel alone in their grief. The charity believes they deserve better and wants to let people know it has grief support available for everyone who needs it.
Sue Ryder offers a range of online grief support, from a bereavement community, and counselling. Search ‘Grief deserves better’ or visit sueryder.org/GriefDeservesBetter