Relatable Tweets About Not Being A Pet Person

"I’m so much of a non-pet person that I never even got a horse in Breath of the Wild."

We all have pet lovers in our lives ― those who adore their dogs or cats so much that they talk about them seemingly nonstop, never pass up the opportunity to share a cute photo or video, and even manage dedicated Instagram accounts for their “fur babies.”

But there are also folks in the world who simply aren’t pet people. Maybe they just didn’t grow up with pets in their homes or perhaps they’ve never been particularly drawn to animals.

Taking yourself out of the pet equation doesn’t make you a bad person, but you might feel a little out of place when the subject of cats, dogs, rabbits or other creatures comes up. Fortunately, there are folks on Twitter who can relate. Below, we’ve gathered 25 tweets that may resonate if you’re not a pet person.

Ppl are always mad at me for not liking their dog enough. Sorry but he has not said anything interesting at all so far

— Allison O'Conor (@allisonoconor) September 8, 2020

WHAT THE PET PERSON SAYS: Hi! Welcome to my home! These are my kitties, Fluffy and Muffy, and this is my dog, Rover!

WHAT THE NON-PET PERSON HEARS: Hi! Welcome my home! Every visible surface has had an animal's naked anus pressed upon it!

— Sean But Not Forgotten (@SVescott) November 18, 2019

in case helpful to other non-pet people who are pet sitting this summer:
it doesn't help to google "cats"

— Hosam Aboul-Ela (@AboulelaHosam) June 30, 2016

On horseback riding: "I'm afraid the horses will sense how much I dislike animals and buck me out of spite."

— Lesley Nneka Arimah (@larimah) April 25, 2015

[me, patting a dog on the head pretending to be a dog person]: yes ok u are a dog yes

— Jill Gutowitz (@jillboard) May 29, 2017

Friend: "Aww you don't have any pets? Don't you like animals?"

Me, a mother- tiptoeing around with baited breath trying not to wake the baby, unwashed shirt to exude a calm familiar scent, shaking out an industrial bag of goldfish crackers all around me: "Something like that"

— ~*Wellness Witchery*~ (@TheMandiEm) January 16, 2019

Boy, pet stores don’t like it when you ask, “What is the most delicious animal you sell here?”

— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) September 6, 2013

**during work zoom meeting**

All my colleagues are taking about their cats like they’re people.

Me, a non-pet person: pic.twitter.com/YKWvqV224U

— Mary (@marjgib) November 23, 2020

I’m not a pet person at all so my biggest fear is having kids who want/love pets 😭

— Highly Melanated (@Hlatse_M) June 9, 2021

Those of you “trapped” under a dog or cat, seriously: what’s the worst thing that would happen if you got up and did something else? Asking as an obvious non-pet person.

— Bart Leahy (@WritingGopher) February 20, 2021

I’m so much of a non-pet person that I never even got a horse in Breath of the Wild

— Layne Watts (@Laynerswatts) November 1, 2019

Okay if people can consider some animals their friends, it shouldn’t be that weird to have animals that you consider your enemies.

— Josh Gondelman (@joshgondelman) December 1, 2020

One thing I'll never be able to relate to is people deciding to purchase a dog during the pandemic

— Shadi Hamid (@shadihamid) June 13, 2021

Don't feed the animals. They like it too much.

— RanGenie (@LoveYourFacexo) May 19, 2013

Non-Pet people: "Does everyone on the planet really need to know how much you love your pets?"

Pet people: "THE PUBLIC HAS A RIGHT TO KNOW!

— J. Skyler (@jskylerinc) May 23, 2017

"Are you a cat person or a dog person?"

Neither, actually.

"Do you hate animals?"

No, I don't.

"Wait, didn't you pet Neil's dog the other day?"

I did.

"So you're a dog person!"

Nope.

"How can you pet a dog if you don't love them?"

By moving my hand over the dog's fur. 🙄

— Asexual ACES (@asexualACES) August 14, 2021

I know I'm not a pet person because my only thought watching this was "damn, did Bear live for 27 years?!" https://t.co/fMX6PrCMy5

— maegan not megan | a problem solver (@maedinamerica) February 14, 2023

“Are you a cat person or a dog person?”

Neither. I’m a raccoon person. Nothing but respect for my garbage burglar. Trash bandit. Tiny thief.

— Lex Play 🪴 (@lexplayyy) April 30, 2021

Me being a non-pet person, I’ll see a video of someone feeding their dog human food and I’m like astonished they can have it. Like in Hawkeye I had to verify with a friend of dogs can eat pizza. Just saw another video where someone gave their dogs apples. Wild

— KYM (@KYM__Possible) October 15, 2022

The irony is, I'm not even that much of a pet person. I'm just keeping up a furçade. pic.twitter.com/na6DVgSi6u

— Cate Pearce (@cate_pearce) February 18, 2023

Have never been a pet person or understood pet culture but I pet sat a cat who slept next to me every night and now she’s gone and nothing is the same

— yaseera (@al_yaseera) November 5, 2022

I’m not a pet guy… and when I see someone pick up dog crap at 6:30am I remembered why not lol

— Manny Lopez (@manny_lopez19) August 3, 2022

I honestly don’t get pet owners’ comfort level with proximity to pet buttholes.

— Felon Musk (@HaganJeff) May 2, 2020

Today a big dog got loose from his owner and jumped on me and licked my face and his name was Riker and I’m not even a dog person but it was Good

— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) June 6, 2020

"Are you a cat person or dog person?"
Neither, fuck all them creatures equally

— OZYMANDIAS IS TOO FLY (@timiretimzzy_) January 4, 2022

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