14 Rude But Funny Valentine’s Day Cards

Look, sometimes love is sending someone an aubergine emoji. Sometimes it’s telling them you have a sausage to put between their buns. It’s a funny emotion, what can we say?

On the most romantic day of the year, you might like to tell someone you’re nuts for them. You may prefer to give them permission to sit on your face. It’s your call. But if you fancy someone and you want to send them a completely inappropriate message, we’ve got you covered. Or uncovered, as the case may be.

Behold, the best NSFW Valentine’s Day cards.

Dat Ass Tho, OffbeatPaperCo, Etsy, £3.61

Don’t Even Think About It Puzzle, Moonpig, £3.29

I want to poke you cactus card, Moonpig, £3.29

Funny Valentines Card, Sioux Alice, via Etsy, £2.35

Feeling Fruity Aubergine Card, Moonpig, from £3.29

Friends With Benefits Card, Foggish, via Etsy, £3.40

Spank That Ass, Scribbler, from £2.49

I Have A Sausage To Put Between Your Buns, CuteEXE, via Etsy, £3.39

Is Your Name Margherita, Scribbler, from £2.49

I’ve Seen Your Willy, Scribbler, £2.49

Feeling Fruity Peach Card, Moonpig, £3.29

Breast Valentines Card, Square Pineapple Gifts, via Etsy, £2.80

Blow Me Valentines Card, Freckle and Specs, via Etsy, £3.45

I Totally Fancy The Pants Off You Card, Moonpig, £3.29

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