Are you thinking about moving to London? Well, it's an amazing city but you do have to be ready to make some big changes in your life to adjust to living here. Whether you're a country bumpkin from the UK or travelling to start a new life here from overseas there are a few things you should know, straight up.
People Will Piss You Off So Damn Much
No one tells you about London's urban emissions of negativity and rage that pollute the airways. There is a lot of bad attitudes lurking around these parts and it will start to get to you. The tube will be the biggest trigger of your inner rising rage because people are either:
A) Too slow.
B) Don't move out of your way (that drives me so mad, people seem to think they can walk through you sometimes instead of politely side stepping! Urghhhh).
C) Too pushy.
D) Have massive bags that get in your way.
E) Push in.
I have a theory that as soon as people get handed a London postcode they get dished up with a big plate of self importance (hey! It happened to me too! I'm no saint!) and that's our downfall. We get that typical Londoner attitude and as a result it makes us grumpy as hell. But try your best to not let it get to you.
As my favourite girl Taylor Swift says, you've just got to Shake It Off and try to be kinder yourself.
When people are rude to you, you just have to realise it's nothing to do with you, it's all about them. My biggest feel good tip is to help others as much as you can (especially on the Tube) and to actually say hi to people. By changing your attitude, you change other people's too. It will restore your faith in people, I swear.
Your Oyster Card Will Become the Bain of Your Existence
I couldn't believe how expensive a little bit of plastic could be (oh no wait, I have a credit card too!) but seriously that little blue card is a nightmare. You will learn the hard way that:
A) Pay As You Go is bloody expensive and doesn't last 5 minutes.
B) A monthly pass is pricey but it does work out better in the long run. It's not fun parting with that money though.
C) You will lose that card when you are in a mega busy rush (it's bound to happen). Just remember to register it online and then if you do loose it you can get your money back. And I seriously recommend getting a spare for emergencies.
London Is Like Living in Never Neverland
In London we stay young (well in our minds we do). What I mean is, we basically we put off the typical social norms here for as long as we possibly can. People in their 30s in London are still living in the same shared house dives they lived in during their student years because it's cheaper and more fun. So, of course, mortgages, marriage and babies are a rarity here you may be pleased (or not pleased to know). While all of your friends back at home are settling down, you will be working your butt off, partying hard and dating. Yes, the casual dating epidemic is rife in this big city.
Men very rarely want to settle down here. Take one look at internet dating profiles and check the 'what I am looking for' section....it's chocca with 'casual dating', 'no commitment' and 'casual sex'. This place is full of 'Peter Pan' Russell Brand type boys who most certainly don't want to grow up....you have been warned.
Or maybe I'm just looking for love in all the wrong places haha! Most probably...but I am not the only girl who feels this way believe me.
You Actually May Have to Make an Effort With Your Appearance Even Down the Supermarket
God you should see where I live. It's like DILF central, you can't go out looking crappy when you go to supermarket or for a run in the park. Certain neighbourhoods maybe you can get away with it, but in places like Stoke Newington, kiss those sweats goodbye.
Or if you're a grumpy singleton like me and just don't care, just try it...coz one step into Clissold park or Highgate Village and you will be regretting it, trust me.
If a Man Looks Supermodel Beautiful He is Most Likely A) an Cocky Asshole or B) Gay (damnit!).
I can't vouch for the supermodel lookalike women but this is the general way this one goes for me and my friends with the beautiful boys. You catch eyes with a gorgeous guy in a club, he either comes over and demonstrates his cocky hipster attitude and tries every move in the book to get you back to his for a one night stand OR he just blanks you and pinches his boyfriend's bum instead. God damn it.
What do you think? Have you noticed other annoyances since moving to London?