How much more enjoyable would your life be if you were more relaxed whilst living it?
Most of us live our lives in a state of overwhelm.
We are tense, overstimulated and stressed.
We have a million and one things to do, responsibilities to uphold, promises to keep, tasks lists to get through, families to provide for and everyone and everything wants our time and energy.
What we forget amongst all this is that living in a state of relaxation is actually our most natural way to be even if we have a busy schedule to work through.
Here are three practices for enhanced relaxation, even for the busiest of people.
Slow down your internal world.
Slowing down isn’t just about taking actions more slowly and deliberately, it is more about slowing down our thoughts and worries about the actions we are taking or are going to take.
For instance, when I go food shopping with my partner we both often get easily irritated by the experience. There are lot’s of people blocking the way, so much to choose from with food everywhere we look ( I know, it’s terrible right!?) and machines beeping and talking.
There is a lot going on externally, added to that are our thoughts about all of the external things going on, plus the decisions we are trying to make, working out where everything is and the remembering of what we are actually there to buy.
These experiences for the human mind often create a lot of unneeded tension.
We create more stress than is actually necessary because it is only our minds that make things hectic, even in the busiest of places or in the fullest of schedules.
The more we resist an experience or attach to the negative thoughts we have about the experience then the more we make it worse than it actually is, we create a tension around it.
This practice is about slowing down internally whilst the world around you is a state of rush, detach from your resisting and negative thoughts about the experience and your external world will become smoother and much more enjoyable.
Practice letting go of the need to control everything.
Letting go of the need to control can be very scary for a lot of people, our minds will create a lot of resistance to it because it means trusting in the universe and allowing experiences to happen.
I personally find it a difficult practice, often I will find myself wanting to control the most uncontrollable of things, such as how much a dog is barking near by, or whether it is going to rain tomorrow or not.
I don’t like having to experience things I didn’t fully choose to experience, but then I love spontaneity too.
Can you guess which one comes from fear and which one doesn’t?
Spontaneity is the way the world mostly works, we literally have no idea or control over what is going to happen in our lives from one moment to the next. Sure we can choose to make ourselves a nice breakfast, but then we could trip on a upturned bit of carpet on the way out of the kitchen and our food is suddenly all over the floor, that happens to other people too right? Yeah. Life is that uncertain ha ha.
The more we become present to this moment and accept it how it is the more we can then let go of how the next moment unfolds and allow it to be just as it is supposed to be.
Consciously soften and relax your body.
Recently I have begun a practice of being very aware of any tension I hold in my body.
Sometimes I find myself clenching my jaw, sometimes I find myself walking around with tense shoulders, sometimes my stomach will be tight and other times my breathing will be shallow. I even realised how much I clench my anus, have you ever heard the expression “He’s a tight arse”? It isn’t just about the amount of money we are willing to let go of, we are literally tight in the arse.
Once I become aware of these things I consciously let go of the tension, I drop the tension wherever it maybe by focusing on that area and intentionally relaxing it.
What part of your body do you hold tension? Maybe your shoulders are tight? Do you breathe shallow under pressure? Practice inhaling the intention of love, peace and relaxation into your tension and then exhale stress, tension and fear. You’ll be amazed at the difference it makes.
Living a relaxed life isn’t something you have to wait for, like retirement, a holiday to the canary islands or even that 10 minutes of meditation you schedule in each day.
I invite you to relax now, loosen up and lighten up.
You deserve to relax.
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