Is it too early to talk about Christmas yet? Can't be... I've heard Chris Rea sing about 'Driving home for Christmas' in shops (don't worry Chris you'll make it you've got over a month) and the BIG Christmas adverts have premiered on TV. So please don't block my blogs as I'm talking about Christmas already.
Last year, we invited my mum... AAAARRRRGGGGGGHHHH! and my in-laws. Double AAAARRRRGGGGGHHHH! round for Christmas dinner.
Don't get me wrong, I get on fabulously with them (sometimes I think I get on better with them than their daughter, but that's another story) but the thought of cooking a Christmas dinner for everyone filled me dread.
So I bought a humorous apron (no it wasn't a rude one or a Christmas one as I reused for barbecues) and wrote a TO-DO for cooking dinner, I thought I'd share the list with you all this year. Here it is taken from a photo of the scrawled timings I posted on Facebook complete with the asterisks I drew at the time, I love a good asterisk on a list. (Obviously don't take my turkey cooking timing as verbatim, I'd hate to poison you on Christmas Day.) Don't forget if you want your Brussel sprouts soft they need to go on the hob sometime around the end of November.... As each procedure was complete I crossed it off the list.
2016 Christmas Dinner TO-DO list
Sitting down to eat at 2.00 P.M
* Vegetables peeled Christmas Eve whilst drinking wine
* Turkey Crown in bottom oven - 11.00 A.M.
* Open secret bottle of red wine in kitchen and pour glass -11.45 A.M
* Potatoes put on to par boil - 12.40. P.M Move to bottom oven - 1.00 P.M
* Pour more of secret stash of wine 1.05
* Parsnips on to par boil - 1.00 Move to top oven - 1.20
* Stuffing in oven at - 1.10
* Laura's Goat cheese flan thingy in top oven - 1.30
* Open bottles wine for table to breathe - 1.30
* Vegetables on hob at - 1.35
* Yorkshire puddings add to potatoes roasting tin - 1.45 (Authors note: Okay I cheated and used frozen ones)
* Finish 'kitchen' wine.
* Gravy make with water from steamer 1.58. poor into gravy boat at 1.59...
* Put into serving dishes at 2.00 and carry through to dining room. (hopefully to tumultuous applause.)
Back to the present. You will note there was no recipes involved as I'm no Delia or I wouldn't presume to give you stuffing recipes better than your Great- Great-Great-Grandma's that have been passed down on a piece of parchment from the eighteen eighties.
Everybody enjoyed it no one came down with salmonella. Am I doing it again this year? Nope we are having a quiet one this year, just Laura (my good lady wife), our son and myself. It might be a bit more relaxed as we are off down the pub for a pint first.
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