I have here before me the complete list of this year's Oscar winners.
Please don't ask me where I got them. I'll never tell*.
Best Actor in a Leading Role
DeForge Gliffiths, 'Nobody's Wax'
Best Actor in a Supporting Role
Olfactory Respectington III, 'Prostitutes'
Best Actress in a Leading Role
Mary O'Mary O'Mary, 'Untitleable Gaspar Noé Experiment'
Best Actress in a Supporting Role
Mary O'Mary O'Mary Jr., 'Untitleable Gaspar Noé Experiment'
Best Adapted Screenplay
Joseph Goose, 'Slobadobalobanob'
Best Animated Feature
'Drenched Bullock', dir. Theomax Lick
Best Animated Short Film
'Cool Animatings', dir. Noel Somebody
Best Art Direction
Embrian Pantangalang, 'Golf Story'
Best Cinematography
Jennifer Boops, 'Nobody's Wax'
Best Costume Design
Piotr, 'Prostitutes'
Best Director
Chrimbulont Gasplackenes-Tremockatoad, 'Pain'
Best Documentary Feature
'Polynesian Bagpipe Techno'
Best Documentary Short Subject
Ennui
Best Film Editing
Zeus Murphy, 'PCP Evening'
Best Foreign Language Film
'Tóg É Sin As Mo Chúl'
Best Makeup
Nic Cage, 'Leaving And Then Entering A Box Of Chocolates Through A Tiny Hole Beside The List Of Ingredients'
Best Original Score
Aphex Twin, 'Locust Enema'
Best Original Screenplay
Waiter Matthau, 'Whassa Matta Peeta?'
Best Original Song
Jablonkaty Sacks Flop, 'I Am A Prostitute And I Am Proud Of That' from 'Prostitutes'
Best Original Story
Hermeticles Seelt, 'Drenched Bullock'
Best Picture
'Hooved'
Best Sound Editing
Blarry Whipe, 'Golf Story'
Best Sound Mixing
Stephen Breasts, 'AD EXSECUTIONEM CONSTITUTIONIS CONCILII VATICANI SECUNDI DE SACRA LITURGIA RECTA ORDINANDAM'
Best Visual Effects
Fork Lichtenstein, 'Nobody's Wax'
Live Action Short Film
'Obnoxious Kevin Smith Webcam Sycophant'
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*slept with the entire Academy
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This piece also appears on Astonishing Sod's website.
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