Sexuality is one of those things that is so often overlooked, but so vital for our mental and physical health. With one of my 2017 goals being to work on my own energy levels and happiness, sexuality was right up their on that list.
My first sexuality mission started just the other day by taking a trip to a lingerie shop in the heart of London. I walked in and promptly proclaimed that I didn't feel sexy anymore. The sales assistant took me by the hand, grabbed a bag and started filling it with pieces of lingerie I didn't even know what to do with. Pink lacy one - pieces that held everything together; bodies that pushed me up and sucked me in at the same time; and silky satin pyjamas to get me out of my 3 times too big, ripped cotton ones. She then led me upstairs to the personal shopping area, popped me in a giant changing room with some champagne, and ventured off to get me some un-released items that were waiting in the stock room for their debut. Yes, I had one tiny sip of champagne for the experience but that was all, I promise!
As I pulled off my faded bra and stepped into a totally unnecessary black piece, I felt transformed. I got that sparkle back. My hips even started doing a little dance in the mirror, clearly pleased with my choices. Despite those inevitable lumps and bumps, I knew in that moment, I was still sexy. My confidence was coming back just from trying on some knickers, and it felt utterly fabulous.
Ok, when I got home, spending guilt overwhelmed me and I ended up taking a few things back... BUT.... I had some sexy underwear and I felt great.
Sexuality is not just about the physical action of sex; it's about treating your body with respect, and getting in touch with a part of you that is sometimes locked away
It didn't end there though and the next day I decided to fulfil one of those life long ambitions... I booked myself in for a pole- dancing class!
With recent dance class experience filling me with a bit of dread (the teacher had actually stopped the class to ask why I looked like I was having a fight with myself!), I concluded that holding onto a pole couldn't be too difficult, so with shorts on and my hair down, I threw myself into the room.
It was phenomenal. I can't explain just how feminine I felt in those 60 minutes, but it did something wonderful for my self-esteem. It wasn't about performing all the right moves, being in time with the music or comparing myself to anyone else; it was about letting go, flinging my hair back, and embracing the female body I'd been blessed with. I was gutted when the hour was over, but after the teacher declared that we were OK to move onto the foundation course, I knew this was where all my 2017 funds were going to go.
When you take the time to explore, treat yourself and care for yourself it goes a long way. I often thought that to feel well and alive it has to just come from the inside, that deprivation made you more spiritual, which in turn meant that you were a better person if you lived with less. Yet, I'm realising that that theory is not all together true. Sometimes you do need things, you need textures and you need visuals to get you into a certain mindset. Deprivation is not is rewarded, and you can feel spiritual and sensual by having some really nice material things; it doesn't mean that you're materialistic.
...my theory is that stagnant sexual energy can contribute to some of the reproductive and hormonal issues that we're seeing today
Sexuality is not just about the physical action of sex; it's about treating your body with respect, and getting in touch with a part of you that is sometimes locked away. You don't have to walk around in low cut tops and short skirts to feel the power of your own body, and you don't have to tell the world about your pursuit of sexuality. You just have to do something for yourself regularly that connects you to this energy.
I really do believe that we're holding this part of us so tight and making it so closed off that the sexual energy doesn't have stagnates in the body. In Traditional Chinese Medicine, stagnant energy or "chi" can manifest as physical problems, and my theory is that stagnant sexual energy can contribute to some of the reproductive and hormonal issues that we're seeing today.
We need to let this energy free however we want to in ourselves. It may mean pole dancing or sexy lingerie, or equally for you it may mean having more intimate time with your loved one, or even yourself!
This is all part of the journey to loving ourselves and healing our body from the inside.
For more information on how to look after your body, or for an individual nutritional therapy consultation, please visit: www.jodiebrandman.com