Internet
Grumpy cat.
It's the World Wide Web's 25th Birthday!
'Ironically, this phone call is the longest we've been stably connected.'
Put down the smartphone.
'I was just bored and it was a running joke among friends.'
'Theresa May and I will be watching you.'
In short, the PM is making it a crime to have certain, warped sexual fantasies, to get excited, in your head, by things that the vast majority of us find disgusting. He's making the enjoyment of certain fantasy images and fantasy words into a thoughtcrime.