"I used the old 'I gave birth to you' on my daughter, she said 'That was one time.'"
"Thinking about the time my 3yo forgot the name for chicken nuggets and called them 'orange meat cookies'."
The heavy hitter seems to have some Twitter jitters, saying Friday he was terminating the $44 billion deal.
"That’s a bit of good news for the day, I suppose, isn’t it?”
The actor drew criticism for a tweet arguing that the word "woman" is being erased.
"My toddler said 'I feel drinky' and yeah girl, same."
"Weird pregnancy craving of the day: Chinese food and mashed potatoes. At the same time."
"What next – King Herod with a Children in Need badge?"
"My kid told me he deserved more cheese and who am I to argue with that"
“If you’re not a total racist, please STOP doing this," activist Sunder Katwala tweeted.