"Someone's gonna have to run this by me...has to be a gag right? RIGHT?!"
"Parenting is missing your kids when they’re asleep, and missing your sanity when they’re awake."
"Commute to school – 3 minutes. Wait in the drop off line – 3-4 business days."
"It should be illegal for your child to change their favourite character without giving you a 30 day notice."
"Where do we start with this one..."
"My 4yo calls the nail salon the Toe Salon, and anyway…that’s what it’s called now."
It's just the latest development in the ongoing debate about waste in UK waterways ahead of COP26.
The former president's new complaint gets an "F" for historical accuracy.
"The most important thing he taught me was to start with kindness and the only thing that matters is how many people you help", she tweeted.
"Parenting is about having open communication with your kids, mostly through a closed bathroom door."